~Forgive a Cheating Spouse??~

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2005
~Forgive a Cheating Spouse??~
867
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 7:58pm

Would you or could you possibly forgive a cheating spouse? Why or why not??

Is there hope after infidelity?

Do you think SAHM's are more likely to forgive a cheating husband then WOHM's due to financial dependence/independence?

~Jenn

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Fri, 06-03-2005 - 9:25pm
Technically it was Grimalkinskeeper, not grimskeeper. . .if that changes your mental image.

Virgo

Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 8:08am

You need to add another factor, though, which may narrow down your field: we're talking about a person who creates a series of rigid, nay, unbendable rules for social conduct, rules which, upon further examination, are revealed to be based on illogical, unknowable, and contradictory "facts."

CLW, for example, said that she treated her two children differently because they had a 30-point difference in IQs. We heard an awful lot about the 30-point IQ difference. It was the basis for all sorts of interesting parenting choices, such as deciding which kid could do which activities and when. The less intelligent kid, as I recall, had to do all the activities the smarter (and younger) kid wanted to do and did very well, because it was very important that the older girl start accepting her limitations as soon as possible. About a bazillion posts later, we learned that neither kid had ever had her IQ tested. It was made-up nonsense.

How many people in the world make up stats like that about their children, and then use the made-up stats to justify treating them vastly differently?

Congratulations! I'm so happy to hear it. I just heard the good news and popped back over, just in case you were still checking in.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 9:18am
Good job not misspelling ad nauseam. Very, very rare to see that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 9:21am
Salty indeed. You know, I've only been here a few months. And I really haven't seen that kind of language used. So if it appears more than once, you can't help but suspect it comes from a single source.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2004
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 10:11am

Only if I'm doing the same.

I don't recall saying my kids have a 30 point difference in their IQ's or that one has to do all the activities of the other in order to accept her limitations early.

However, I do think that we, as a society, protect our children from the normal ego bumps and bruises to a fault. Their comes a point where protecting your children makes them more fragile. I think part of a parents job is to make sure their children can deal just as well with losing as they can with winning. Sounds like she takes this to extremes.

We do the same with our children's physical health. I'll have to look for it but I recently glossed over a piece on how our children are actually more prone to disease today because of all the antibacterial products and us keeping their environments too clean. While we did stop our children from getting sick, we also stopped them from exercising their immune systems.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 10:16am

So we can blame your parents for your getting so bent out of shape when your boyfriend dumped you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2004
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 10:19am
No, I didn't say my parents did. And no, I didn't get bent out of shape when I left him for cheating. I got on with my life.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 10:33am

<>

Good, then your parents are in the clear. There must be some other explanation for your jaundiced view of human nature. Which appears to have followed you all the way to the present. The whole time you were getting on with your life.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2004
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 10:42am

Do tell. This should be interesting. You think MY view is jaundiced?

No, my view stems from having self respect.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Sat, 06-04-2005 - 10:46am

I believe she was referring to your overly negative view of others and human nature, in general.


Virgo
 

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