Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?
1258
Tue, 02-10-2004 - 6:41pm
Something I've often wondered about, but never had the opportunity to ask. Why do SAHM or SAHD need a full time nanny, especially when they aren't working from home. I can easily see the need if the SAHP is a WAHP, but what is the logic for a full time nanny otherwise?

Any comments?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:17pm
I understand fully that the typical sahm with a nanny doesn't spend 40plus hours away from her kids. I've stated numerous times that I was responding to the posts regarding (and I quote) a sahm who spends 53 hours away from her kids and leaves them in a nanny's care. I don't know who or why 53 hours came to be the magic number, but that's precisely the person I'm responding to.

It isn't the logical extension of what I said, because clearly you have no idea of what I was talking about.

"You said "How does a mom who neither works nor cares for her children benefit the family? What is her purpose in life - and please don't tell me it's to look good."

That is what I said, that is what I meant. If the sahm in question isn't dumping her kids the majority of the time, then I'm not talking about HER. She isn't a mom who doesn't care for her kids, is she? Get it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:23pm
We pay our occasional high school & college aged babysitters $10 an hour to babysit.

Hugs,

Bridget & Ethan (5)

Avatar for ahlmommy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:24pm
No not exception. Sorry but having anyone full time in your home to help you care for children is a luxury. I am not saying that it isn't better for children to have a mother that has help especially in this case. My grandmother's maid had 11 children. She didn't have help. She took care of them all day long, and cleaned my grandparent's house 2 days per week so that they could live in a house my grandparents owned for free. Her husband worked full time to pay for their needs. She would have loved someone to help her. Good grief, when I spent 1 week every summer at my grandmother's house I would always beg her to let me go to Mrs Josephine's house. She ALWAYS took me back to her house and I spent the night at least one night there. She had 12 those nights. Yep her older ones helped out with the kids. But never had a nanny.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:25pm
Wait a minute, you're telling me that preschool is childcare?

Not where I come from. Around here, EVERY CHILD goes to preschool. If they can't afford it there are free programs or scholarships. I've never even heard of a 3 year old who didn't go to preschool. Even moms with nannies always send their kids to preschool, it's not an either or proposition. P&J and iaudrey, aren't you going to send the kids to preschool?

Is that really why you chose preschool for your child, to get things done? I always thought people did it for their children's enrichment and to prepare them for school (hence the name). The free time for me was just a fringe benefit.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:39pm
I don't think I'd have a lot of respect for someone who did that, no. But I also don't know of anyone like that, who is working only for extra's while leaving their kids in a nannies care fulltime. I DO know plenty of people (myself included) working for extra's, but only when their kids are in school, or only part time.

Most people I know with fulltime nannies can afford all the frivolous niceties regardless of the nanny, regardless of a second income.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:44pm
I still view a nanny for a SAHM as a luxury, even if it "only" costs 12-15K a year.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:49pm
I find it highly unlikely that a woman who puts following her bliss above her children, and who prioritizes it above all else, will have children who are unaffected. Look at all the messed up kids of celebrities who didn't have time for their kids, they had all the best nannies money can buy.

But I could be wrong.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 2:54pm
Nah, not preschoolers.

I gave up considerable financial rewards to stay home with my kids because they are/were the center of my universe and they were worth it. Plenty of time to teach them those things when they're older.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 3:04pm

Because you CAN teach them when they are older, you don't think one should set an example for them now?

SUS

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 3:17pm
My older one is in preschool 9 hours a week.

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