Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?
1258
Tue, 02-10-2004 - 6:41pm
Something I've often wondered about, but never had the opportunity to ask. Why do SAHM or SAHD need a full time nanny, especially when they aren't working from home. I can easily see the need if the SAHP is a WAHP, but what is the logic for a full time nanny otherwise?

Any comments?

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-1999
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 8:00pm
I wouldn't expect anything less from you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-1999
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 8:05pm
Look, all I've been trying to say is that unless you are intimately involved with the situation, you never know why a person does what they do and you shouldn't judge them based on appearances alone. You can't make a unilateral statement that a SAHM who has a FT nanny and spends a lot of time away from home is selfish.

But I guess you just can't see that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 8:13pm
You're right. Maybe they're just having an affair, are out gambling or have a nasty drug habit.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 9:28pm
I agree with you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 10:08pm
I am not arguing that one is better than the other and I am actually very pro-volunteerism, but if I could get paid for it too, I'd be all for it.

SUS

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 10:17pm
Several years ago, when I lived there, Salinas had the highest COL in the whole country.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:09pm
Certainly, there are degrees of luxury, but those degrees are at the descretion of the individual. How much something costs is not a measure of whether or not it is a luxury item. What is luxurious to me may necessity to you. I would consider a housekeeper a luxury whereas others find it an absolute need. (even though I would consider it a luxury I have yet to employ one... I just can't get past having someone else pick up my dirt)
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:14pm
If the parent doing something "fluffy" is going to harm the relationship in the long run, then so will the parent going off to work. What the parent is doing while absent is totally irrelevent - if the parent is a caring and attentive parent. This is my issue with this topic - there is a complete double standard. Somehow children are not harmed by their parent's absence IF the parent is earning an income and IF that income is needed by the family. I know audrey commented that her nanny's 5 y/o seems to make the connection. My almost 6 y/o is a pretty bright boy and he *kind of* makes the connection wrt work/money, but he also thinks a better way to make money would be to go the store and "buy *stuff*, then the cashier will give us change". These are abstract concepts and young children are not able to think abstractly.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:17pm
If hiring a nanny to care for one's children is considered neglect, then you'd best turn yourself in. You have made it clear you are choose to WOHM. Therefore, you are CHOOSING to leave your children in a situation that you are now claiming to be inferior to your own care. You simply cannot have it both ways.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:25pm
Yes, look at those celebs. Many of them were neglecting their children while they were WORKING. Absence is absence and I agree that it can do damage to the relationship. Not that it always does, but it certainly can.

Pages