Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?
1258
Tue, 02-10-2004 - 6:41pm
Something I've often wondered about, but never had the opportunity to ask. Why do SAHM or SAHD need a full time nanny, especially when they aren't working from home. I can easily see the need if the SAHP is a WAHP, but what is the logic for a full time nanny otherwise?

Any comments?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:26pm
Trust me you are much wealthier than we were. The organization that I volunteered for paid for my childcare. Actually the reason that I started volunteering was when my DD1 went off the school my DD2 was lonely at home without her. I could not afford to send her to preschool. So by volunteering she was able to spend a few hours a week having fun at the childcare center. That is what started me volunteering but then I found out that I really enjoyed it so did it for 7 years.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:29pm
I know, I was agreeing with you. I don't think that paid work is worth more, but some here do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:32pm

Gotcha!

SUS

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 11:37pm

If your children figure out that you or your dh's salary alone could have provided a comfortable life for everyone, including paying for most of or all of their undergrad costs, should they resent you or dh for not choosing to SAH?

SUS

Avatar for 1969jets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 8:04am
Why not? You don't need the money yet you spend your time working. I don't see why I would need to justify spending time away from my kids just because I don't choose to work at this time. I have a balance in my life. There are some things I do for dh, some for the family, some for my kids, and some time I spend just for me. The fact that I am not working doesn't make me a slave to home and family.

Jenna

Avatar for 1969jets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 8:07am
I disagree. You can't let the whims of a preschooler rule your house. Not everything a preschooler wants is best for him or the family.

My youngest son is very attached to me. If I let him he would spend 24 hours a day with me. I love him to pieces, but need to have SOME time away from him. I do not feel that he needs to go with me to get my hair done, or to be at the gym with me. So he spends 3 days a week in preschool so I can do some things for myself. Although he would prefer to be with me during that time I feel it is better for him to be away for some time.

Jenna

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 9:17am
It seems that the only benefit an adult can produce for their family is money. The most valuable lessons that we teach our children appear to be the ones that we get paid for or the ones we have to pay someone else for. While it is ok to leave your child in someone else's care for 40 hours so that you can defend drunk drivers because you get paid to do so - and therefore you *directly* benefit your family - it is neglectful to spend over an allotted time to help discourage drunk drivers because your family will not reap the direct benefits. The larger picture is to be avoided at all costs, including the fact that you might be saving your child's life, the lessons of being a responsible citizen, the lessons of how our government works...., because jr. may not think he is the center of the universe if you are not earning money for *him* or directly engaged with *him*. And none of this can even be contemplated until he has the best of every toy, game and education in the bank, becuase it is never ever ever for one second not about him.

I am sure glad that this mentality wasn't the conventional wisdom 100 years ago or we would still be sitting on our hands come election day!

SUS

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 9:47am

I'm more obligated to pay for my childrens' education than I am to save the world and volunteer for 40 or 50 hours a week, every week.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 9:48am
No.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 9:49am
You should Just Say No to volunteering 40 hours a week, every week, if your children's educations are not paid/saved for yet.

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