Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?
1258
Tue, 02-10-2004 - 6:41pm
Something I've often wondered about, but never had the opportunity to ask. Why do SAHM or SAHD need a full time nanny, especially when they aren't working from home. I can easily see the need if the SAHP is a WAHP, but what is the logic for a full time nanny otherwise?

Any comments?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 2:04pm

You have a bigger house than I do and have twice weekly housekeeping help.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 2:04pm
"I don't believe that not paying for college is neglectful."

I don't either, I believe that not TRYING to pay for college is neglectful. Some people just can't, they don't earn enough money with 2 or even 3 jobs in a family, but if a parent chooses to sah when the kids are in school, or to volunteer over earning money for college, then yeah, IMO they're neglecting one of their duties as a parent.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 2:09pm
Some people's responsibilities to their children extend beyond a roof over their head, clothes on their backs and food in their stomachs. Some of us like to provide more than the minimum obligations.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 2:14pm
If you think my points are invalid then refute them rather than dissecting my argument, it's incredibly tedious.

So was there a counterpoint in there? I couldn't find one.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 2:19pm
Are you climbing off that soapbox yet? That was quite a speech, if it had any relevance here that is.

"it really makes me angry when the great spirit of volunteerism that exists in this country is trashed as selfish and useless." Come on, no one here is doing that and you know it. We're trashing lazy, self serving moms, not volunteers. Get a grip.

Avatar for 1969jets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 3:24pm
A decision to hire household help is NOT the same as a preschooler having a hissy fit because his mother has the temerity to want to do something without him. I do not think a parent is being a good parent when they indulge a preschooler's desire to be with his parents every second of the day by refusing to separate. Likewise I don't think it makes lots of sense to spend NO time with your kids when they are preschoolers. Because they DO need some of your attention. But they don't need all of it all of the time.

I understand low maintenance. I am pretty low maintenance myself. The 3 half days a week my preschooler is gone from the house is plenty of time for me. I just don't think a mother has to give up every second of the day to be with her kids.

Jenna

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 3:26pm
Wow, I just can't get over how this "parental duty" supercedes the duty one has for her community or her extended family or her fellow man in need or causes about which she feels passionately.

How do you suppose a PTO in a lower middle class income neighborhood would function if everyone had your philosophy? Would it even matter if the kids had college saved for if there weren't any volunteers in the school or fundraising to make their educations better? (In other words, would anyone even be headed to college if the schools were bereft of volunteers?)

Avatar for 1969jets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 3:26pm
Never said it was. I responding to another post.

Jenna

Avatar for 1969jets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 3:30pm
You need to go back and read the posts.

One of the posts in this thread specifically mentioned that it was NEGLECTFUL for someone to work on getting important legislation passed becuase her kids might have to take out colege loans. NEGLECTFUL is the word that was used.

There were also previous posts about how selfish women who volunteer are and how they are not benefiting their family at all.

So trashing the spirit of volunteerism IS what this thread was about.

Jenna

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Wed, 02-18-2004 - 3:32pm
" I just don't think a mother has to give up every second of the day to be with her kids."

So who said she should?

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