Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Full-time Nanny with SAHP - Why?
1258
Tue, 02-10-2004 - 6:41pm
Something I've often wondered about, but never had the opportunity to ask. Why do SAHM or SAHD need a full time nanny, especially when they aren't working from home. I can easily see the need if the SAHP is a WAHP, but what is the logic for a full time nanny otherwise?

Any comments?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 9:43pm
I just don't see ft volunteering as beneficial, to the extent of being as beneficial as either working for pay or SAH.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 9:46pm
I'd like to know how you define an indirect benefit, since your definition of direct benefit is very broad.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 9:58pm
In the context of something as socially imperative as volunteerism, I don't have a definition of indirect benefit. It's not applicable to something as important as volunteerism is to society.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 10:02pm
C'mon, your answer begs the question. Volunteering is great; volunteering 40 hours a week, not just during campaign season but week in and week out, surely can't be more important than physically being with or financially supporting your own family.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 10:29pm
OMG, I so rarely agree with you that I am in such shock at how VERY MUCH I agree with you here. What a marvelous post! I might just save it I enjoyed it so much!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 10:36pm
Who ever came up with this volunteering 40 hours a week anyway? The thread was started asking why a SAHM would need a nanny. It turned into this SAHM is *following her bliss* or volunteering for 40 - 50 hours per week, and if that isn't enough, she is choosing this life of leisure in spite of not being able to save for her children's education or her retirement. Total foolishness. Common sense would dictate that a SAHM who employs a nanny is in a pretty nice financial situation. If she refers to herself as a SAHM, she more than likely is not volunteering or attending social functions for 40 or 50 hours a week, week in and week out.

I am curious why you haven't addressed your thoughts on my current situation. My children are now in *othercare* for about 35 hours per week so that I can work at a job that is actually costing me money. It is, in essence, a volunteer position. A full time volunteer position working 37.5 hours per week and probably for 2 or 3 months. Am I being selfish? Am I putting my *desires* ahead of my children's needs even if accepting this position is not my idea of *following my bliss*? I am truly curious as to your take on it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-20-2004 - 1:10am
Any job that I could get part time while my children were in school would be consumed nearly entirely by taxes (as I stated before, our situation is unique) and/or child care. We feel that the convenience and benefits of a SAHP still outweigh the income I could bring in. Dh's income was always higher than mine - it is the reason that I became the SAH spouse in the first place. A good career move and some lucky breaks have increased dh's earning potential even further; however it also means that in some ways he is less flexible (like long hours and out of town travel), and having a SAHP available on demand balances that out.

I'm actually hoping to go back to school part time while my kids are in school, in a program that interests me and that I may be able to develop into a niche (read "tiny")aspect of our business. Not only will I not be *saving* money for my children's education, I will be *spending* it on *myself*. Ack! The horror!

My children will receive far more financial support for their post secondary educations than dh or I did from our parents, even if we never put another penny away. We are also planning to have our mortgage fully paid by the time the kids are college bound - freeing up a good portion of our net income. I'm satisfied that we are making good choices - the pittance I could make working a few hours a week at Walmart just isn't worth the effort. We are not poor or struggling by any means.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Fri, 02-20-2004 - 1:35am
I'll butt in here. (not necessarily a reponse to you til later but a general post)

I don't know how the views of PJM and slim (or perhaps others too that I'm forgetting) got all twisted here. Here's how I read their posts.

1. Volunteering is not bad. It's good for the world. But it doesn't seem great that a SAHP would spend a lot of her time volunteering at the expense of "providing" for the family. I think the argument came from the fact that PJM used as an example saving for college. If she said health insurance, for example, people may not have disgreed.

2. There are those who spend their "life in leisure." They are not volunteering. They are not taking care of their children. They are not contributing much to the good of society except by being alive. Some of us don't have much respect for this type of a lifestyle.

Do people really disagree that adamantly about the above?

And WRT your question, IF you were "volunteering" *indefinitely* at the expense of providing for your family, especially given that you prefer that your kids be with you, then yea, I'd think something's not right with your situation. But as you said, this situation is for 2 or 3 tiny months so you're asking this question even though you should know that the "debate" does not pertain to your situation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-20-2004 - 6:50am
ITA with your first paragraph if she is affluent to SAH and have full time care then I would assume that college is/will be taken care of.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Fri, 02-20-2004 - 7:43am
So why are you trying so hard to make sure we think your opinion is based on someone who uses child care 40 hours a week and SAH and volunteers 40 hours a week? You feel the same way about ANYONE who SAH and doesn't have college saved for. The whole volunteering thing is merely a distraction as is the SAHP's full time nanny.

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