Is is "hard" being a sahm?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2004
Is is "hard" being a sahm?
2242
Sat, 04-24-2004 - 1:25pm
For many years now, I have heard the claim that being a sahm is the hardest job in the world. I never chimed in, because I didn't know first hand. I stayed home for 6 weeks when my twin daughters, Sophia and Stephanie (almost 4) were born. And that was hard, because I had 2 newborns. Now, almost 4 years later, I have resigned my job and am staying home again. I can god-honestly say that I don't know what's so hard about this. I personally feel like I am on easy street, but maybe that's because I haven't been at it that long. I feel like I am on vacation. It takes no longer than a couple hours a day to do the housework, and the rest of the time is free time for me and the girls. We have gone to the park, the zoo, chuck e cheeses, and I know not every day is going to be like this, but I feel like I am making up for lost time. My children seem happy and relaxed. The only hard thing about this is that they have gotten into some pretty raging fights with each other, but the fights have ended with quick intervention. I guess I am just wondering how long before this becomes "The hardest job in the world" and I start looking like a zombie, complaining that my husband doesn't help me, and so on? Or do I seriously have the choice not to turn into that? Also, do you think that at the rate I am going, I am at risk for getting bored staying home?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2004
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:20am
Your attitude ? That would be for starters!

Oh I get it from all these 1000's of posts. It is you that sadly isn't getting it. Maybe someday you will.........

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2004
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:23am
I hear ya! Wonderful & thoughtful post right on the target.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:23am

No, she is not in piano by choice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:28am

Beneficial how?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2004
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:28am
If my own mother had only had you to take advice from, we may still speak & have a good relationship today.

{It appears as if you are trying to fight preconcieved demons in your child. Not all children WANT or NEED to participate in extra activities to become a good, smart and caring person. Follow her lead...she might suprise you.}

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:35am

Um, what type of "cheerleading class" did you sign this kid up for?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2004
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:41am
Yes, she needs to just be a kid & no pressure, no forcing her to do what mom wants or what mom missed out on.

Grimlins will freak out if her dd ever tells her she isn't going to college & she is going to marry for love.

Threw my mother so far out of the loop we rarely speak & then it always turns into arguing, so she can just stay at her house & keep her mouth shut. Rrrrr, that woman reminds me so much of Grimilins attitude towards her dd, dh, and well, life in general. She is lonely now & paying for not perking up and listening to what others tried to tell her, oh well. Granny tried to give her the same advice you nice sweet ladies here are trying to give Grimlins. Like talking to a brick wall, huh? Granny still says today she shouldn't have wasted her breath but she just knew mom was doing it wrong and now it is a proven fact with our non-existent relationship.

At least I have my dad. We talk every day & he comes over 3 or 4 times a week. I treasure him & wish he had more say in my upbringing, childhood would now be something to reflect upon happily if he did!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:42am

what is she doesn't want to take algebra later.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 7:48am

My own step mother had me and she didn't follow my advice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Sat, 05-22-2004 - 10:31am
GREAT post. It's classic projection, and CLW is probably cognitively incapable of recognizing it (not due to an intelligence problem, but a personality one).

I think CLW would do well to start small, perhaps with piano lessons for HERSELF. Then maybe she could begin to understand her overwhelming need to demand self-actualization from a little girl.

It reminds me of my MIL (who has narcissistic personality disorder) calling my then-2-yo son "anal." LOL. "Anal" usually refers to an adult who is stuck in the anal stage. Surely a 2-year-old is allowed to be in that stage the first time around, when it's completely age-appropriate?


CLW, why won't you say anything nice about your daughter? Why are you resisting that idea so fiercely? What would you be giving up by admitting that she has some nice qualitites?

Congratulations! I'm so happy to hear it. I just heard the good news and popped back over, just in case you were still checking in.

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