Is is "hard" being a sahm?

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Registered: 04-06-2004
Is is "hard" being a sahm?
2242
Sat, 04-24-2004 - 1:25pm
For many years now, I have heard the claim that being a sahm is the hardest job in the world. I never chimed in, because I didn't know first hand. I stayed home for 6 weeks when my twin daughters, Sophia and Stephanie (almost 4) were born. And that was hard, because I had 2 newborns. Now, almost 4 years later, I have resigned my job and am staying home again. I can god-honestly say that I don't know what's so hard about this. I personally feel like I am on easy street, but maybe that's because I haven't been at it that long. I feel like I am on vacation. It takes no longer than a couple hours a day to do the housework, and the rest of the time is free time for me and the girls. We have gone to the park, the zoo, chuck e cheeses, and I know not every day is going to be like this, but I feel like I am making up for lost time. My children seem happy and relaxed. The only hard thing about this is that they have gotten into some pretty raging fights with each other, but the fights have ended with quick intervention. I guess I am just wondering how long before this becomes "The hardest job in the world" and I start looking like a zombie, complaining that my husband doesn't help me, and so on? Or do I seriously have the choice not to turn into that? Also, do you think that at the rate I am going, I am at risk for getting bored staying home?

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Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:03pm

Good points.

PumpkinAngel

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Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:10pm
It works.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:13pm

I'll bore them ;O)

Avatar for mygriffin
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Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:20pm
Hardly. The difference (besides our attitudes) between you and I is that our kids are different ages and that *I* both work AND stay home every week. And I'm not talking about weekends when our spouses are most likely there for support and a break. I work. I love it and I'm good at it. But I also stay home 2.5 weekdays per week. I do it because I want to spend more time with my non-school aged kids and there IS a significant difference between the days I work and the days I'm home. Each are enjoyable in their own ways, and while I wouldn't say either is "difficult," for my personality and disposition, SAH most days is more trying than working. I don't complain about it, it's just a fact for ME. For some, it IS harder to be a SAHM. For others, no. It's not cut and dry like you seem to think it is based solely on your experience and abilities.
Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:23pm
Because she suggested in her post to morgan_leigh that maybe SHE shouldn't have had kids...like there are things we just shouldn't do if we find them difficult. Sheesh, I'd have missed out on a lot of things in my life if I refused to do them because I found them hard.

Oh, I've been around here and there. I just haven't had much to say lately. Maybe I'm mellowing out in my old age. ;)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:43pm

Im not trying to flame you or anything but let me tell you about my situation.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:46pm
The book is insulting to women. Dr. Laura is insulting to women. Period. We are not so weak we need to be taken care of and our purpose in life is not to make our dh's happy. Whether or not you're a good mother/wife/person is not determined by whether or not you use dc. Any dh who would give this book to his wife doesn't think too much of her. The only way I'd recommend someone give their spouse this book is if they want a divorce. That's quite likely what dh is going to get out of the deal.


Edited because of TMI. Decided to take out the personal stuff.


Edited 5/12/2004 9:13 pm ET ET by grimalkinskeeper

Avatar for outside_the_box_mom
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:55pm
Delurking to say, ITA. I could care less if she is liberal or conservative. What I don't like about her is she is a hypocrite. And she is mean, rude, and vulgar. She also claims to be an Orthodox Jewish woman, that she studies Torah with Rabbis, etc etc. Well, the few Orthodox Jewish women I know don't act or dress the way she does. And, the Torah she studies is not the Torah I study each week at temple. Even DS, at age six, knows what "evil tongue" is. It's what she practices every day -- and what we as Jews are taught NOT to do.

outside_the_box_mom

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:55pm
I'm sorry. I think I'm already doing that, I misunderstood. With my older DD and now my 2 yr-old DD, I could put them in their rooms for that one nap each day at about 1 pm. It's my 1 yr-old now who I "listen" to more for signs - from about 3 naps, to now between 1 and 2 naps/day and soon, just the one nap. I really, really hope my 2 yr-old won't give up her nap when my son goes down to just the one nap. I might get an hr or 2 alone.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Wed, 05-12-2004 - 4:57pm
Almost 5, almost 3 and just turned one. That is a great rule!

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