Is is "hard" being a sahm?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2004
Is is "hard" being a sahm?
2242
Sat, 04-24-2004 - 1:25pm
For many years now, I have heard the claim that being a sahm is the hardest job in the world. I never chimed in, because I didn't know first hand. I stayed home for 6 weeks when my twin daughters, Sophia and Stephanie (almost 4) were born. And that was hard, because I had 2 newborns. Now, almost 4 years later, I have resigned my job and am staying home again. I can god-honestly say that I don't know what's so hard about this. I personally feel like I am on easy street, but maybe that's because I haven't been at it that long. I feel like I am on vacation. It takes no longer than a couple hours a day to do the housework, and the rest of the time is free time for me and the girls. We have gone to the park, the zoo, chuck e cheeses, and I know not every day is going to be like this, but I feel like I am making up for lost time. My children seem happy and relaxed. The only hard thing about this is that they have gotten into some pretty raging fights with each other, but the fights have ended with quick intervention. I guess I am just wondering how long before this becomes "The hardest job in the world" and I start looking like a zombie, complaining that my husband doesn't help me, and so on? Or do I seriously have the choice not to turn into that? Also, do you think that at the rate I am going, I am at risk for getting bored staying home?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:38pm

Then she needs to say something about those issues.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:39pm
Some of those things are "me" *and* "couple" time. For example, the other day, we were in bed and I read my magazine while my dh read his book. We were still "together" but doing our things. I consider that "couple time" because I'd stop his reading to point him to an interesting article and he'd stop me to tell me about some line in the book.

Hmmm... about "me" things... going shopping or talking to friends/my sisters or being on the internet. I usually do these things when my dh is working, though. I prefer to go shopping with my dh. And I think I'm not as good a friend because I tend not to call them in the evenings or weekends because I prefer to spend time with my dh.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:41pm
I don't know.

I don't want my dh to ever feel as though I am just *going through the motions* in any regard of our relationship/marriage, and I never want to feel as though he is either, and that's not just sex related, that's everything.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:42pm
I didn't know I did either.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:42pm

Two comments ...


<<because I know at least a few who DO withhold for punishment.

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:44pm
Well, of course! I thought we said that the *couple* has to discuss what the problem may be and come up with a solution *together* rather than the wife "sucking it up and giving in."
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:44pm
Ah, young love.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:45pm

Rarely.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:47pm
So in 5 years, I'll be on the phone with my sister while my dh watches a movie? ;-)

BTW, is there an early birthday wish due?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 3:48pm
I think if the *only* problem is that someone just doesn't feel like it, then yes, they should suck it up and give in every once in a while.

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