Heart vs. Head: The work status decision

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Heart vs. Head: The work status decision
2102
Tue, 01-17-2006 - 1:03pm
Did you make your decision to SAH/WAH/WOH ft/pt based primarily on objective/tangible factors, or with your heart?

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Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 1:28pm
No, you told me you didn't even read the post I was responding to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 1:34pm
I honestly don't know.

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Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 1:36pm

Context is always relevant, but you don't get that when you don't bother to read all the posts. It is not necessary to issue disclaimers in every single post.

I think you're very defensive about not having breastfed, and that's why you keep trying to turn this into something it wasn't about.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 1:40pm
Ah, ok. I can see that. I went through such hell in the first 6-8 weeks that I could see where the "sanity" bit came into play. I ended up having a great time bf and both kids nursed until the were over 2 years old, so I don't think the first weeks are necessarily indicative of an overall feeling about bf :-).
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 2:20pm
i consider raising my kids to involve more than providing them the bare minimum but you right to the extent that they would not die. of course i could also provide with with just bread and water and they probably wouldnt die either. i have been looking and listening to my kids over the last couple of days with this thread in mind and it is amazing the things they do, think and believe that i have had no part in providing them with - i hate to think how limited they would be if they were only being raised by me. and in my opinion the result would be a kid who had not been raised to meet their individual potentials and that is my main goal in raising my kids.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2006
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 2:31pm

"i hate to think how limited they would be if they were only being raised by me. and in my opinion the result would be a kid who had not been raised to meet their individual potentials and that is my main goal in raising my kids."

Just because you feel you have limitations WRT raising your kids by yourself, doesnt mean that there arent other parents who do just fine raising well-rounded children without help.

I have and will continue to provide outside influences in order to give my kids the best opportunities. However, providing influence and exposure are merely extensions of *me* raising my kids.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 2:38pm

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Yes! Well stated.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 3:14pm

i know i have limitations, because my experiences are limited to just my sphere of knowledge. im sure there are other parents who have no such limitations and that is really great for them - im just not one of them, and fortunately for my kids i recognize that about myself.

i agree that outside influences and exposures are equally important and my kids also have that, but there are those certain people in their lives who are in a hands on way contributing to their being raised to become the people they are destined to become. when you have people who are spending 20-30 hours a week investing time, attention and caring in a child i do believe that person is contributing to that childs rearing.

i am not speaking about any other families but mine, but i know i couldnt raise my kids without all the wonderful help i receive. and i have no problem saying it nor do i feel any less qualified as a parent for knowing it to be true for me. like most parents i want so much for my kids, and if to get that for them it means i have to share the raising of them witih the wonderful people who are sharing in that task then i just thank God for bringing those people into our lives to fill that role.
Jennie

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 5:32pm
I get it now.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2006
Mon, 01-30-2006 - 8:36pm
I agree with pretty much everything you say. However, I just dont think that it has anything to do with whether or not you WOH. A SAHP can provide everything you mentioned the same as a WOHP can. Using othercare is not the only way to expose your children to positive experiences.

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