Help! Husband pushing me to find job!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2006
Help! Husband pushing me to find job!
1529
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 10:35am
My husband has just taken a leave of absense from his high paying 80 hour a week job to focus on being home more and finding out what he really wants to do. He is now working 3 days a week at a job he really likes. He always said if he took this job he would find another part time job to supplement the income. I am working weekends and babysitting during the week, but my income is a joke. Our kids are 5 and 3 and cry every weekend when I leave. My problem is this: my husband has put no effort in finding that 2nd job he said he would find and is pushing me to work full time. I want to be a stay at home mom, but it may mean him going back to a job he hates. He says the kids will adjust, get over it. Am I being selfish or lazy for wanting to stay home? Is he being selfish for leaving a good paying job?

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2006
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 7:54pm
Camp for my neice last year was over $3000. Music camp for my pianist is less.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 8:35pm

Wow those are some low standards. Even when I was in high school back in the days of the dinosaur, Algebra was required. In fact, we had to have 2.5 years of math-algebra, geometry and 1 semester of an elective type math (I think I took Consumer math or some other bonehead math. I hated math, lol).

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2005
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 8:50pm

That is whay my dh asks me.

Of course, if I wear a suit every workday of my life, even if the style lasts for decades, the clothing will eventually wear out. I currently own 16 suits, and I swear it seems I have to wear the same freaking thing all the time. And when one just dies of old age, I just have to replace it. Then I need blouses or sweater sets to go with them. And shoes. And coats. Slacks and twin sets. Then clothes for the weekends. And some formal wear for events and dinners. Something appropriate for the soccer field, or a kids' piano recital, or for hosting a babay shower. We have summers, springs and winters. And sometimes things get stained, or old looking, or a button falls off and can't be found, or a hem rips one too many times, or the lining rips and the outfit just needs to be retired.

Between me, dh and three kids (in school, soccer, swimteam and piano), $3K sounds like a bargain.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2006
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 8:51pm

I never claimed we have high standards here. We were required to take two years of math but no specific math classes. My parents made me take math every year though.

As of 2012, I believe, (I'm in Michigan) kids will be required to pass two semesters of Alegbra to graduate. I find that a low standard given that they're pulling algebra down to middle school. Which, IMO, is a big mistake because I think kids need to be able to think abstractly to do algebra.

I was horrible at math in high school. I was still very locked into concrete thinking. I needed something like a Singapore math approach to algebra but it wasn't available. I left high school convinced I was stupid and didn't go to college until I was 25 and then I only went for a certificate. I was suprised to find that I was good at math. Very good at math. Even though it had been several years since I'd looked at a math book, it just made sense. It was like someone switched on a light.

Looking back, and looking at dd#1, I'm convinced I was locked in concrete thought. For some reason, I didn't cross the developmental milestone into abstract thought at the same time as my classmates but when I got there, I apparently did so with a vengence. High school math was a struggle for me but engineering math was easy. In fact, the higher up I went, the easier it got. Until Advanced Engineering Mathematics that is. That's backwards math and done in a guess and check way and I don't like guess and check, lol.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 8:58pm
Algebra or Algebra II? The school I went to is now requiring Pre-Cal for everyone. Where do you live?


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 9:29pm
That's how it was at my high school, too. Although not too many people took physics-- the teacher was bad. Many people opted for AP Chemistry instead.


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 9:45pm
I can't believe the standards in Michigan are so low. The high school I attended has required everyone to pass Algebra II to graduate since my mom was in high school in the 60s. I took my first semester of Algebra in 8th grade. The schools are now offering it for 7th grade so students can take AP Calculus their senior year without having to take two math class their junior year. Or so they can take AP Calculus as juniors and take Calc II at the University their senior year.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-1998
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 9:48pm


I too have an engineering degree, (civil) as well as a masters in geology (hydrogeology to be exact). I went back to school four years ago, completed my grad. diploma in education, and have never had any problem finding a job (either in Australia, where I first worked, or in British Columbia, where I now live).

I currently work part time in a job share (by choice). I get several job offers a year, particularly for teaching physics. Many postings come up over the course of the year, but they are filled very quickly out of neccessity - they can't have a class without a teacher for very long! Looking at postings mid-year is not representative of what is out there.

It seems to me that you are overstating the "glut". In B.C., in order to hire a non-qualified teacher (which, in essence, is what you are, since you haven't done your student teaching), then it has to be proven that there are absolutely no qualified applicants for the position. I'm assuming that is the same case where you live, from the comments you've made in your posts. Of course there are going to be other qualified teachers out there...because that teacher who squeeked through teachers' training by the skin of their teeth HAS to be hired before they hire you. And, in truth, I feel that this is only fair. They have proven they are qualified to teach, whereas you haven't. I know many former engineers that are fabulous teachers, but I've also known many engineers who'd be horrible...I don't presume to know how you will (would?) teach, but then, those doing the hiring at these schools can't know that either until you've given it a go.

The reality is, most people who want to make a career change have to bite the bullet and do the training...and yes, it's usually without pay. If teaching is something you really want to do, and you feel you will be good at it, then you will likely have to make sacrifices (like the vast majority of other student teachers out there).

However, if you prove to be any good at teaching on your practicum, I really do think you won't have any trouble getting a job!

Heather

PS - my school, with 1200 students, has seven full-time science positions (one biol, one biol/chem, one chem/phys, one straight physics, one phys/earth sci (me) and two teaching solely junior science (grades 8-10). Our province requires students to take science in Grades 8 through 10, as well as one Grade 11 science for graduation. Many students end up taking six science courses in the last two years of school (Gr. 11/12 phys, chem and bio). We have, on average, three blocks of physics 11, two of physics 12, 4 chem 11, 3 chem 12, 4 biol 11, 3 biol 12, 2 earth sci 11, one Sci and Tech 11, and 9 or 10 blocks of each junior science grade...total blocks of science: about 52 blocks, of which a full-time position is seven blocks a year. Sometimes the new math teachers also end up teaching a couple of the junior science courses as well.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 9:49pm

When Dylan's 1st grade teacher left in January for medical reasons, they didn't hire another teacher but used long-term subs on 3-month contracts to finish out the school year. So I suspect that is the usual practice at the district level.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2006
Thu, 02-15-2007 - 9:53pm

I'm sure different districts have different requirements. As I recall, mine required 2 years of math, two years of science, 4 years of english, I can't remember how many years of gym, political science, health, history and government to graduate.

Personally, I think 4 years of math, science and english should be required and students should have one social science course each year. That's 4 out of 6 classes. The better high schools around here require more math and offer math on multiple levels to accomodate the students who may never get past algebra.

Pages