Help! Husband pushing me to find job!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2006
Help! Husband pushing me to find job!
1529
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 10:35am
My husband has just taken a leave of absense from his high paying 80 hour a week job to focus on being home more and finding out what he really wants to do. He is now working 3 days a week at a job he really likes. He always said if he took this job he would find another part time job to supplement the income. I am working weekends and babysitting during the week, but my income is a joke. Our kids are 5 and 3 and cry every weekend when I leave. My problem is this: my husband has put no effort in finding that 2nd job he said he would find and is pushing me to work full time. I want to be a stay at home mom, but it may mean him going back to a job he hates. He says the kids will adjust, get over it. Am I being selfish or lazy for wanting to stay home? Is he being selfish for leaving a good paying job?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 12:39pm
Poor old Michigan. I left there in the early 80's during the "foreign car" financial crisis when the automakers were laying off left and right and unemployment was very very high. I left shortly after I applied for a job at McDonalds and got put on a waiting list. Perhaps because people with Masters degrees had taken the slot I thought was a shoo-in. It's sad to use McDonalds as an employment barometer but it works. Stickers started appearing saying "Will the last person out of Michigan please turn out the lights". I left, but I wasn't the last. Michigan seems to be limping along in much the same woeful shape as it was when I left nearly 25 years ago.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 12:41pm
Why do you think more people don't relocate to look for work?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 1:01pm

They are relocating for work.

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 1:59pm

"The idea that it takes some sort of special aptitude to do math is a myth"

are you kidding me? I STINK at math! I didn't even take math my senior year of high school is how bad I stink -- I went on to be a dean's list student at Holy Cross majoring in English and theater and never looked at math again. There is a way of thinking about math I have never gotten--and thankfully never have to. And once my dd is past 4th grade math she can go to my exhusband for homework help.

but moy point is that it does take a special aptitude just like being a good creative writer takes a special aptitude, just like being skilled in science takes a special aptitude. not everyone can do everything --

 

Yes. We. Did.

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 2:04pm

"There isn't really some sort of rare, abstract thinking ability to learning algebra. It's simply a matter of effective teaching and diligent application, of the sort that too many of us think is beyond middle schoolers. "

beyond middle schoolers?// Honey 'abstract thinking and diligent application" is BEYOND ME

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 2:08pm

I stink at math too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 2:09pm

Publishing a novel might take a gift, but anybody who is willing to do some homework can do math or science.

Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 2:12pm

NO-- it doesn't mean every on can do it -- I was president of my national honor society and I BARELY made it through Alegbra II by the skin of my teeth -- and it's not cuz i didn't 'apply myself' - i had tutors I studied my you know what off -- I AM NOT GOOD AT MATH.

and yes for many people it DOES take a special kind of skill to learn to read -- for many it does take a special skill to put two sentences together.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 2:12pm
Well, if you weren't/aren't willing to apply yourself, then of course some things might be hard for you.

Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 02-16-2007 - 2:13pm

did I say I didn't apply myself? did I say I wasn't willing to apply myself -- I had two teacher for parents, 'not applying oneself' was never an option trust me...

 

Yes. We. Did.

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