Help! Husband pushing me to find job!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2006
Help! Husband pushing me to find job!
1529
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 10:35am
My husband has just taken a leave of absense from his high paying 80 hour a week job to focus on being home more and finding out what he really wants to do. He is now working 3 days a week at a job he really likes. He always said if he took this job he would find another part time job to supplement the income. I am working weekends and babysitting during the week, but my income is a joke. Our kids are 5 and 3 and cry every weekend when I leave. My problem is this: my husband has put no effort in finding that 2nd job he said he would find and is pushing me to work full time. I want to be a stay at home mom, but it may mean him going back to a job he hates. He says the kids will adjust, get over it. Am I being selfish or lazy for wanting to stay home? Is he being selfish for leaving a good paying job?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 3:28pm

Haha! They really do!

My agency has a live person answer the phone from 8:30-4:30 five days a week so we get a lot of "chatty phone calls". Lonely seniors just looking to have someone to talk to for a few minutes. Once they get you going...and I never have the heart to rush someone off the phone...you know the conversation is going to come around to bm's or lack thereof at some point.

Other fun topics? Status of wounds and woundcare and u.t.i.'s!! Lol.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 3:36pm

I disagree. I work in one of the wealthiest counties in the country. We have some low income seniors...but most of our clients are moderate to high income. The moderate income people are the ones most unprepared in my experience. Theyve lived comfortably enough all this time, and are shocked to find out how little Medicare covers, how much care costs, etc.

In terms of saving...I dont know an exact figure. I guess it really depends on what you want your old age to be like. You will get the care you need in old age, when your money is gone Medicaid eventually will kick and pay for your care...but if you want choices, want to leave something to your kids/grandkids, dont want to lose your family home...that requires a lot of money.

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Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 3:40pm

"Medicaid eventually will kick and pay for your care...but if you want choices, want to leave something to your kids/grandkids, dont want to lose your family home...that requires a lot of money. "

hear hear! I have an 80 year old mother on medicaid in state supported assisted living and she is nearly penniless b/c she and my father always lived on the campuses of the state run schools where they taughte, never owned a home, scrimped to save what they can etc..but my dad's been gone for 17 years and my mom had really no resources. We even had to sign her life insurance over to the funeral home to prepay her funeral and get her into this facility which is nothing great.... my whole adult life I've been driven by one desire...to NOT be my parents. its' why I own a home, it's why I have 2 retierment accounts, it's why i struggle to save for my dds college, and it's why I go without so many things b/c I am determined not to be in her position in my old age.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 3:44pm

"I guess it really depends on what you want your old age to be like."

That's what I think too, but according to other posters living expenses have little to do with how much you need to save for retirement.



iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2006
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 3:48pm

Unlike you, even on a public debate board, I would never knowingly make a statement that may label me a bigot to people who believe that gays and lesbians are protected by constitutional civil rights.

I personally have no interest or regard for organized religion, but I respect that others do have deeply held beliefs. I am willing to share my perspective that I am not a follower of any organized religion in the context of a debate so others may understand where I'm coming from, but I think it would cross the line if I said all religion is a crock because my deeply held beliefs says that its so. I think you leaped over the line by writing with the following post, I hope, unknowingly, to a lesbian parent:

I've yet to see any compelling argument that "gay parenting" is terribly sad or wrong.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 4:12pm

Uhmm...most scholars understand that there were many things written that were not accepted as inspired Scripture, sure. Some of those writings we have, and some we don't, and were are undoubtedly others of which we've never heard. Do you think anything anybody ever wrote in antiquity that expressed an opinion about God was Scripture?

I can't think of a single mainstream denomination that accepts the idea that the canon of Scripture, as it has stood since the 4th century, is incomplete. Can you tell me where I could find these historians and theologians who might tell me otherwise?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 4:27pm
Exact citation please?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 5:09pm

Where do you get your numbers? Totally made up.


Do you really think you are in a good position to guess what the expenses are for the family of four with a household income of $30K?




No (but then again, neither are you).

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 5:10pm
You spend less than $1,000 per calendar year to clothe all 4 of you?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 5:11pm
Ok.

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