Help! Husband pushing me to find job!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2006
Help! Husband pushing me to find job!
1529
Tue, 11-07-2006 - 10:35am
My husband has just taken a leave of absense from his high paying 80 hour a week job to focus on being home more and finding out what he really wants to do. He is now working 3 days a week at a job he really likes. He always said if he took this job he would find another part time job to supplement the income. I am working weekends and babysitting during the week, but my income is a joke. Our kids are 5 and 3 and cry every weekend when I leave. My problem is this: my husband has put no effort in finding that 2nd job he said he would find and is pushing me to work full time. I want to be a stay at home mom, but it may mean him going back to a job he hates. He says the kids will adjust, get over it. Am I being selfish or lazy for wanting to stay home? Is he being selfish for leaving a good paying job?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 11:12pm
i dont for one minute believe that what you believe is wrong for you - but it is wrong for me. it is not what my lord and savior teaches.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2006
Tue, 02-13-2007 - 11:31pm

I am more than confident that my path is righteous, but thanks for you concern.

Like many Bible passages, when taken in its entire context, Romans can be interpreted in many ways. Personally, I find many of Paul's writings quite wacky and contradictory, so I won't bother to spend much time on this. I personally don't think Paul was commenting on a committed relationship between two consenting adults. Paul did get it right once, though:

Romans 13:9,

Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not kill, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Thou shalt not covet; and if any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 12:27am

The only things I truly see as right or wrong are those things that do harm to others. I live by the saying "First, do no harm". Otherwise, its mostly shades of grey.

You are not being honest because you keep saying you are not judging, yet every post of yours is full of judgement. Whats really sad is you dont seem to be being honest with yourself-you want your way to be the only *right* way to live, and cant seem to see how judgemental that is.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2006
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 12:33am

Another personal story - T is my best friend going back to 1st grade. I think I always knew she was gay (at least as long as I knew what it was), but she only came out to me when she was in her late 20s. L&T (friend and her partner) and my DH and I led parallel lives, we met, we committed to a relationship (DH and I got married, they could not), and we decided to start a family around the same time. I was able to get pregnant without medical intervention; they chose to pursue adoption rather than IVF. 18mos after dd was born, we decided to adopt to add to add our family, nine months later ds can home to us; L&T were still waiting...18mos later we lost our minds and decided to adopt ds #2, and 12 months later we're a family with 3 children. L&T still waiting...The day ds#2 came home to us(they greeted us at the airport) , L&T got their call, their son was born the next day. L&T's #2 son joined their family about 2 years later.

Everything was harder for them, but they kept on perservering. They are amazing parents. They believe in the traditional SAH value, L is SAH, and T is WOH; I'm not totally on board with that, but I'll give them a pass ;-).

Families are forged in different ways; L&T have the strength of steel. I love, support, and admire them for all they had to do to get where they are.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 12:44am

Like I said in another post, my decisions about right and wrong stem from one thing-doing no harm and the golden rule. I teach my children to treat others as they would wish to be treated, to try to understand that not everyone is the same and that is okay. My children are the most open and accepting kids one could ever meet-never will they ostracize or look askance at someone for being different from them. We treat different as a good thing in my family-in fact we encourage it.

The precise reason I see your viewpoints as *wrong* is because they pass judgement on people who are not like you. To me, that does harm to others.

what on earth will you do if one of your children turns out to be gay?????

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 12:58am

To claim to live thru GOD's word, your not being very kind, imo.

I love God too, many of us do, here. We have to sahre him :)

I live by the philosophy as treat others as you would like to be treated. We are all equal. :)

I love my GOD he rock's is is very kind loving and forgiving.

Im praying for you!




Edited 2/14/2007 1:06 am ET by xenozany
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 12:59am
Amen!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 1:04am
God bless you and your family, I think your dynamite.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 1:08am
I think you are being very unfair. ALL sin is the same my friend.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2006
Wed, 02-14-2007 - 1:11am
Brilliant, cheering wildly!

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