Hitting the "Mommy Wall"
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| Mon, 10-24-2005 - 11:19am |
I am surprised that this actually comes as a surprise to women trying to re-enter the workforce after taking time off to SAH. *Anyone* taking a not-so-brief hiatus from their career should expect the same treatment IMO . . . you're not going to be able to pick up right where you left off.
BTW - "hi" everyone! I've missed it here! :)
Women raise kids, lose careers
By TENISHA MERCER
THE DETROIT NEWS
Veronica Golubovic spent more than 20 years on the runways of Paris, Italy and New York as a designer for some of the most powerful names in fashion -- Yves Saint Laurent, Donna Karan and Perry Ellis.
But it was a three-year gap on her resume -- the hiatus she took after the births of her two children -- that garnered the most attention from prospective employers four years ago when Golubovic tried to resume her career.
She hasn't forgotten one recruiter's look of discomfort when she explained she was a stay-at-home mom. Or the way a top official at a retailer dismissed her during an interview with, "Oh, so now you don't know if you want to be a stay-at-home mommy."
"I came here thinking I've done so much, but it was very difficult," said Golubovic, 45, who eventually opened a designer clothing store in Birmingham, Mich., earlier this year. "I didn't think people would be hung up on it, but it was shocking and surprising. I couldn't believe their reactions."
Thirty years after women began joining the work force in large numbers, many are hitting the "mommy wall" when they try to return to work after having children.
They find it difficult -- if not impossible -- to return to the same positions they left, according to a recent study by the Forte Foundation in New York and the Wharton Center for Leadership and Change at the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania.
Unprepared for the obstacles they face on their return, many opt out of traditional corporate jobs and move to smaller companies. Experts dub the trend the "female brain drain" and say the exodus is coming just as businesses need talented, experienced workers to fill the gap as baby boomers prepare to retire en masse, leaving the biggest labor shortage in history in their wake.
"This is a defining issue for women," said Monica McGrath, an assistant professor at Wharton, who spearheaded the study. "Women who leave as vice presidents are not coming back as vice presidents. Now is not the time for corporations to squander billions of dollars in talent and enthusiasm at their fingertips. This is a talent pool that organizations need. We have a voice at the table, and I would hate to see us lose that."
The study found that half of working mothers who returned to work felt discouraged by their employer. Eighty-three percent ended up accepting a comparable or lower-level position, while 61 percent changed industries. About 45 percent of the women surveyed started their own businesses, and 59 percent went to work at smaller companies. The study is based on interviews with 200 women, most of them with MBA degrees.
The results add more fuel to the debate about whether and how women can blend careers and family. Even as women are graduating from law, business and medical schools at almost the same rates as men, they find their careers shifting in very different directions from their male colleagues once they have children.
"They want to spend time with their children, and it can be very time-consuming," said New York-based Cindy Swensen, who coaches executive women on how to return to work after having children. "Volunteering at the bake sale is probably not going to help you re-enter the work force."
It's a strange phenomenon for a generation of women who were raised to break down barriers while "having it all" -- even if that meant delaying or postponing plans to have children to focus on their careers.
"We hear very few stories of people just stepping back in where they left off," said Joanne Brundage, executive director of Mothers & More, a Chicago-area support group for working women who postpone their careers to have children.
"Clearly, there is a price to be paid for not staying full-time, full-force in most professions," Brundage said. "I think women who are becoming mothers now have a different set of priorities than women did 15 to 20 years ago. Unfortunately, the message may change, but the environment stays the same."
It's a message Cynthia Aks wasn't prepared for. The first female surgeon to graduate from the residency program at Oakland General Hospital in Madison Heights, Mich., in 1990, Aks battled her share of discrimination from colleagues who didn't care to work with women surgeons, she said.
But after Aks, an emergency room surgeon, decided to have a family in her late 30s, she found it tough to regain the solid career footing she had before her triplets were born nearly 13 years ago. Forced to take seven months off for pregnancy complications, her contract was not renewed, she said, because the hospital didn't know how to deal with a female surgeon with children.
Aks resumed her career as a specialty surgeon, but at a huge cost: Her salary plummeted 60 percent.
"The perception is that you cannot juggle multiple hats effectively," said Aks, 49, who now owns a medical practice in Southgate, Mich. "I believe it's challenging, but you can. You can have high aspirations, be successful, have a family and still be involved. It's not equal for women, and I don't think it ever will be."
Southfield, Mich.-based accounting firm Plante & Moran offers tailored work arrangements such as seasonal work, telecommuting and contract employment to retain working mothers. The firm offers the options to management only.
"We want to accommodate people and their schedules," said Bill Bufe, partner and human resources director at the accounting firm. "We've had people who wanted to leave, but we wouldn't let them. We made things much more flexible for them and allowed them to continue to keep their toe in the water here and do what they needed to do in their family."
CHANGING FOCUS WHAT WOMEN CAN DO
WHAT WOMEN CAN DO
Tips for preparing to return to work:
Create a "re-entry" plan with specific goals
Foster a network for support while away from the work force
Volunteer while away and make sure that experience can be framed in business terms when you want to go back to work
Stay connected to colleagues
Maintain professional licenses and memberships and attend continuing education courses
Take classes to refresh knowledge and skills
Stay informed about the business implications of global and economic changes in your field
Secure contract work while away
Be realistic about how long it will take to re-enter the work force
Sources: Wharton Center for Leadership and Change, the Forte Foundation
CHANGING FOCUS
A survey of women returning to work after raising families found many shifted professional roles:
Accepted comparable or lower-level job: 83 percent
Changed industries: 61 percent
Changed functional role: 54 percent
Became self-employed: 45 percent

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"EXACTLY what I have been saying. So why again is it that you keep pushing me to answer a question that is entirely impossible when you are actually admitting, finally that it's entirely impossible?"
Ah, but it's *NOT* impossible to answer the question from an individual context, you know the kind that I "keep pushing you to answer"? From an objectively accurate context, yes. But from an individual context, no. You do understand the difference between the two contexts, right?
Perhaps you should review post 1036:
"I am in no way trying to assume/pretend that I can define oe clarify some sort of narrow context that could possibly be objectively accurate for *all* people.
In fact, IMHO, what you are asking/expecting of me is entirely impossible. With that said I have a few more questions for you?
Why do you seem to be under the impression that an objectively accurate context exists in the first place?
Why do you seem to think that *I* can provide you with this objectively accurate context, seeing as *I* clearly don't believe that such a thing exists in the first place?"
Save face with whom?
PumpkinAngel
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Which I have already addressed and yes I do understand the difference.
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Nope, addressed that already.
PumpkinAngel
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"I'm not under any such impression nor have I stated anything about objectively accurate context, that of course is your spin and addition, not mine."
Actually, I do believe that you are under such an impression.
"I simply asked you for your context or asked you to define the variables in the question, since it was after all your question and not mine."
So, if I repost my individual context as well as my answers to the questions based on that context, you will do the same? Be careful here, as I have already offered both in this thread. It's merely a matter of reposting them.
Are you absolutely sure that you want to committ yourself not only to sharing/defining/elaborating on your *own* individual context, but also to actually answering the questions that have been posed to you based on your *own* individual context?
Eventhough you just outright stated that you *REFUSE* to do so? If this is the case, why the sudden change of heart? BTW, get back to me when and if you truely plan to "committ yourself not only to sharing/defining/elaborating on your *own* individual context, but also to actually answering the questions that have been posed to you based on your *own* individual context?
I'd more more than happy to repost *my* own individual context and answers.
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OK, if I were faking sick, I wouldn't have minded it.
Hugs,
Bridget & Ethan (5)
I think it's a bit different leaving your teenager home for 8 hrs while you are work vs leaving your teenager at home sick while you go out of town for a week. If my 14 y/o were that sick that he/she wanted me to come home, I or dh would most likely only be a phone call away.
I remember being home alone sick as a teen while my parents both worked. My mom was only 5 minutes away at her office, so it really wasn't necessary for her to stay home with me. I typically laid on the couch and either slept or watched tv all day. Why would I need her home?
I'm not saying I would never stay home with a teenager, but I think it would certainly depend on the circumstances.
I once ended up at home alone for a week with pneumonia when I was 15. It was miserable. I had no way of calling my mother and by the time she got back, it was so bad that I needed several months to recover.
Still, I think that's kind of extreme. I wouldn't have a problem leaving a 14 yo at home for several hours with a mild illness, especially with a very short commute. I didn't really mind being at home alone at that age if it was something fairly mild.
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"I don't."
Then why do you keep asking me to provide it for you?
And if you're not asking me to provide you with *an objectively accurate context*, WHy then do you keep asking me to provide you with definitions, variables, clarifications with regard to *your* own individual context?
If you'll remember the questions were purposely broadly worded so that each person could interpret them *individually*.
Again, I simply cannot interpret the questions *FOR* you, as that wouldn't be *YOUR* interpretation, now would it? Likewise, I cannot provide you with *an objectively accurate context* either. Therefore, seeing as *I* can't provide you with *EITHER*, why do you keep asking me? Don't you have *YOUR OWN INTERPRETATION*?
Is there some reason why you are so fearful of sharing it, seeing as you have gone so far as to *REFUSE* to answer the questions *FROM YOUR OWN PERSONAL CONTEXT*? What gives???
Well, when you're sick, wouldn't you appreciate it if someone was home making sure you were taken care of?
Hugs,
Bridget & Ethan (5)
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