Hitting the "Mommy Wall"
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| Mon, 10-24-2005 - 11:19am |
I am surprised that this actually comes as a surprise to women trying to re-enter the workforce after taking time off to SAH. *Anyone* taking a not-so-brief hiatus from their career should expect the same treatment IMO . . . you're not going to be able to pick up right where you left off.
BTW - "hi" everyone! I've missed it here! :)
Women raise kids, lose careers
By TENISHA MERCER
THE DETROIT NEWS
Veronica Golubovic spent more than 20 years on the runways of Paris, Italy and New York as a designer for some of the most powerful names in fashion -- Yves Saint Laurent, Donna Karan and Perry Ellis.
But it was a three-year gap on her resume -- the hiatus she took after the births of her two children -- that garnered the most attention from prospective employers four years ago when Golubovic tried to resume her career.
She hasn't forgotten one recruiter's look of discomfort when she explained she was a stay-at-home mom. Or the way a top official at a retailer dismissed her during an interview with, "Oh, so now you don't know if you want to be a stay-at-home mommy."
"I came here thinking I've done so much, but it was very difficult," said Golubovic, 45, who eventually opened a designer clothing store in Birmingham, Mich., earlier this year. "I didn't think people would be hung up on it, but it was shocking and surprising. I couldn't believe their reactions."
Thirty years after women began joining the work force in large numbers, many are hitting the "mommy wall" when they try to return to work after having children.
They find it difficult -- if not impossible -- to return to the same positions they left, according to a recent study by the Forte Foundation in New York and the Wharton Center for Leadership and Change at the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania.
Unprepared for the obstacles they face on their return, many opt out of traditional corporate jobs and move to smaller companies. Experts dub the trend the "female brain drain" and say the exodus is coming just as businesses need talented, experienced workers to fill the gap as baby boomers prepare to retire en masse, leaving the biggest labor shortage in history in their wake.
"This is a defining issue for women," said Monica McGrath, an assistant professor at Wharton, who spearheaded the study. "Women who leave as vice presidents are not coming back as vice presidents. Now is not the time for corporations to squander billions of dollars in talent and enthusiasm at their fingertips. This is a talent pool that organizations need. We have a voice at the table, and I would hate to see us lose that."
The study found that half of working mothers who returned to work felt discouraged by their employer. Eighty-three percent ended up accepting a comparable or lower-level position, while 61 percent changed industries. About 45 percent of the women surveyed started their own businesses, and 59 percent went to work at smaller companies. The study is based on interviews with 200 women, most of them with MBA degrees.
The results add more fuel to the debate about whether and how women can blend careers and family. Even as women are graduating from law, business and medical schools at almost the same rates as men, they find their careers shifting in very different directions from their male colleagues once they have children.
"They want to spend time with their children, and it can be very time-consuming," said New York-based Cindy Swensen, who coaches executive women on how to return to work after having children. "Volunteering at the bake sale is probably not going to help you re-enter the work force."
It's a strange phenomenon for a generation of women who were raised to break down barriers while "having it all" -- even if that meant delaying or postponing plans to have children to focus on their careers.
"We hear very few stories of people just stepping back in where they left off," said Joanne Brundage, executive director of Mothers & More, a Chicago-area support group for working women who postpone their careers to have children.
"Clearly, there is a price to be paid for not staying full-time, full-force in most professions," Brundage said. "I think women who are becoming mothers now have a different set of priorities than women did 15 to 20 years ago. Unfortunately, the message may change, but the environment stays the same."
It's a message Cynthia Aks wasn't prepared for. The first female surgeon to graduate from the residency program at Oakland General Hospital in Madison Heights, Mich., in 1990, Aks battled her share of discrimination from colleagues who didn't care to work with women surgeons, she said.
But after Aks, an emergency room surgeon, decided to have a family in her late 30s, she found it tough to regain the solid career footing she had before her triplets were born nearly 13 years ago. Forced to take seven months off for pregnancy complications, her contract was not renewed, she said, because the hospital didn't know how to deal with a female surgeon with children.
Aks resumed her career as a specialty surgeon, but at a huge cost: Her salary plummeted 60 percent.
"The perception is that you cannot juggle multiple hats effectively," said Aks, 49, who now owns a medical practice in Southgate, Mich. "I believe it's challenging, but you can. You can have high aspirations, be successful, have a family and still be involved. It's not equal for women, and I don't think it ever will be."
Southfield, Mich.-based accounting firm Plante & Moran offers tailored work arrangements such as seasonal work, telecommuting and contract employment to retain working mothers. The firm offers the options to management only.
"We want to accommodate people and their schedules," said Bill Bufe, partner and human resources director at the accounting firm. "We've had people who wanted to leave, but we wouldn't let them. We made things much more flexible for them and allowed them to continue to keep their toe in the water here and do what they needed to do in their family."
CHANGING FOCUS WHAT WOMEN CAN DO
WHAT WOMEN CAN DO
Tips for preparing to return to work:
Create a "re-entry" plan with specific goals
Foster a network for support while away from the work force
Volunteer while away and make sure that experience can be framed in business terms when you want to go back to work
Stay connected to colleagues
Maintain professional licenses and memberships and attend continuing education courses
Take classes to refresh knowledge and skills
Stay informed about the business implications of global and economic changes in your field
Secure contract work while away
Be realistic about how long it will take to re-enter the work force
Sources: Wharton Center for Leadership and Change, the Forte Foundation
CHANGING FOCUS
A survey of women returning to work after raising families found many shifted professional roles:
Accepted comparable or lower-level job: 83 percent
Changed industries: 61 percent
Changed functional role: 54 percent
Became self-employed: 45 percent

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"I think that you have made your point that not everyone wants to be in the work force."
Thanks, but that wasn't the only point I made, or even the most salient.
"The discussion about gaps in the employment record is about people who do want to return and how they will explain those gaps when they do."
Yes, and some people seem to think that having a gap in employment due to SAH with one's children is not only unacceptable but irresponsibile, unambitious, and even thought of as "quitting and not cutting it".
"Of course not everyone wants to return to the work force. But we weren't talking about them."
Well, obviously I was talking about them :)
because on average the National gaurd and reserves do not move their familys nearly as much as an active duty family. Like I posted my husband and I have moved (since being married a total of 6 different states in under 8 years. Prior to that add three states to my husbands total making it 9 for him and add two to my total making it 8 for me since I was 18. Normaly when the National Gaurd is activated or Reserves the familys tend to stay in the same place as before.
Ofcorse that is just what seems to normaly happen. There are situations that are different
So in other words, you would find some means of employment, whether it would be outside the home or not. Does the "workforce" not include at home employment? If you're working, you're working. Doesn't really matter where you do it. And you'd rely on alimony or SS? Yeah, that will fully support you.
And you were replying to PNJ, not kbmamm when you said "Why is it that this kind of mindset is seemingly the "only" reasonable and/or rational possibility or option in life?" I wasn't aware that kbmamm made up "popular opinion." Your response to me makes no sense. If you said, "Kbmamm's opinion is not reasonalbe/rational" then maybe your comment would make sense.
"Does the "workforce" not include at home employment?"
No, I personally wouldn't consider self publishing a book to be the "workforce".
"If you're working, you're working. Doesn't really matter where you do it."
That's your opinion. I work at home presently writing my book, but I wouldn't consider myself to be part of the "workforce".
"And you were replying to PNJ, not kbmamm when you said "Why is it that this kind of mindset is seemingly the "only" reasonable and/or rational possibility or option in life?"
Actually, I replied to both of them with post 412 (if you read my statements in the context in which they were intended perhaps they might make more sense). Sorry for the confusion :)
BTW, here is the statement made by PNJ that I was responding to:
"I don't want the potential employer to regard a SAHM as having the same employability as I do, because I've given up being at home with my children and want to make sure that's perceived as a definite advantage for me."
Also, here is the first paragraph of my response to her:
"Of course you have every right to your opinion. In fact, I can even see where you're coming from at some level. However, I think that SAHM's (among others) are equally entitled to their opinions as well. With that said, I would like to elaborate on my own personal POV, experience, opinions as a SAHM."
"I wasn't aware that kbmamm made up "popular opinion."
Well, *SHE* certainly seems to think that she does :)
"Your response to me makes no sense. If you said, "Kbmamm's opinion is not reasonalbe/rational" then maybe your comment would make sense."
What response would that be? The following response from post 436 where I specifically mentioned kbmamm?
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"Have you read any of kbmamm's posts?"
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"Nope, it was my own quote."
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"Umm, that would be kbmamm."
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Yes, and the fact that you spent a lot of time arguing in favor of subsistence farming as a valid life choice says a lot. What happens if the family's one steer gets sick? What do they have to barter then? That you can so blithely ignore these questions is indicative of a MSAH mentality.
The fact that you bailed on the debate as soon as questions about health insurance and medical care came up says a lot.
It's very easy to pooh-pooh workers' contributions to their family when you limit the debate to, "will we have food on the table tonight?"
As long as I can touch on
PumpkinAngel
it doesn't suggest moving, no, but it certainly suggests deployment, in case you haven't been reading the papers in the last 4 years or so. of the people I know who are reserves or national guard, the average number of deployments they have experienced since 9/2001, have been 2.5, with the deployments lasting an average of 10 months at a time (one is comintg up on his 20th month of deployment).
So again, we have people who upon your having trained them, won't be around to use the skills.
It's rather weak to claim that the possibility of relocation is a worth drain on your possible resources, while totally ignoring the fact that you could well be receiving the benefits of someone else's training, AND while pretending that national Guard and Reservists don't pose just as problematic.
Quite honestly, what's clear here is that your acceptance of national guardsman and reservists has far more to do with being forced to consider them by federal law; otherwise, given the grounds under which you openly admit to discriminating against military spouses would be equally applicable.
Karen
"Dear Whoever Makes The Credit Sequences: We are all really, really over the creepy head-turning thing. I swear. We really are. If we ever want any more creepy head-turning, we'll be sure to tell you. Everyone looks uncomfortable doing it, it makes everyone's smile look dead-eyed and soulless, and you really must stop. Make them put on a puppet show. Make them do the Macarena. I would prefer anything to being further terrorized by all the head-turning.
Miss Alli
Karen
"Veronica: "I hate fake deer too. Every time I see their stupid fake-deer faces I want to grab a shotgun and go all Cheney on 'em." Sure, but since fake deer don't talk, they won't
Since I didn't say it was the *only* reason nor did I speculate on a broad term about why some women are not returning to work it certainly could be.
PumpkinAngel
Karen
"Dear Whoever Makes The Credit Sequences: We are all really, really over the creepy head-turning thing. I swear. We really are. If we ever want any more creepy head-turning, we'll be sure to tell you. Everyone looks uncomfortable doing it, it makes everyone's smile look dead-eyed and soulless, and you really must stop. Make them put on a puppet show. Make them do the Macarena. I would prefer anything to being further terrorized by all the head-turning.
Miss Alli
Karen
"Veronica: "I hate fake deer too. Every time I see their stupid fake-deer faces I want to grab a shotgun and go all Cheney on 'em." Sure, but since fake deer don't talk, they won't
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