Hitting the "Mommy Wall"
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 10-24-2005 - 11:19am |
I am surprised that this actually comes as a surprise to women trying to re-enter the workforce after taking time off to SAH. *Anyone* taking a not-so-brief hiatus from their career should expect the same treatment IMO . . . you're not going to be able to pick up right where you left off.
BTW - "hi" everyone! I've missed it here! :)
Women raise kids, lose careers
By TENISHA MERCER
THE DETROIT NEWS
Veronica Golubovic spent more than 20 years on the runways of Paris, Italy and New York as a designer for some of the most powerful names in fashion -- Yves Saint Laurent, Donna Karan and Perry Ellis.
But it was a three-year gap on her resume -- the hiatus she took after the births of her two children -- that garnered the most attention from prospective employers four years ago when Golubovic tried to resume her career.
She hasn't forgotten one recruiter's look of discomfort when she explained she was a stay-at-home mom. Or the way a top official at a retailer dismissed her during an interview with, "Oh, so now you don't know if you want to be a stay-at-home mommy."
"I came here thinking I've done so much, but it was very difficult," said Golubovic, 45, who eventually opened a designer clothing store in Birmingham, Mich., earlier this year. "I didn't think people would be hung up on it, but it was shocking and surprising. I couldn't believe their reactions."
Thirty years after women began joining the work force in large numbers, many are hitting the "mommy wall" when they try to return to work after having children.
They find it difficult -- if not impossible -- to return to the same positions they left, according to a recent study by the Forte Foundation in New York and the Wharton Center for Leadership and Change at the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania.
Unprepared for the obstacles they face on their return, many opt out of traditional corporate jobs and move to smaller companies. Experts dub the trend the "female brain drain" and say the exodus is coming just as businesses need talented, experienced workers to fill the gap as baby boomers prepare to retire en masse, leaving the biggest labor shortage in history in their wake.
"This is a defining issue for women," said Monica McGrath, an assistant professor at Wharton, who spearheaded the study. "Women who leave as vice presidents are not coming back as vice presidents. Now is not the time for corporations to squander billions of dollars in talent and enthusiasm at their fingertips. This is a talent pool that organizations need. We have a voice at the table, and I would hate to see us lose that."
The study found that half of working mothers who returned to work felt discouraged by their employer. Eighty-three percent ended up accepting a comparable or lower-level position, while 61 percent changed industries. About 45 percent of the women surveyed started their own businesses, and 59 percent went to work at smaller companies. The study is based on interviews with 200 women, most of them with MBA degrees.
The results add more fuel to the debate about whether and how women can blend careers and family. Even as women are graduating from law, business and medical schools at almost the same rates as men, they find their careers shifting in very different directions from their male colleagues once they have children.
"They want to spend time with their children, and it can be very time-consuming," said New York-based Cindy Swensen, who coaches executive women on how to return to work after having children. "Volunteering at the bake sale is probably not going to help you re-enter the work force."
It's a strange phenomenon for a generation of women who were raised to break down barriers while "having it all" -- even if that meant delaying or postponing plans to have children to focus on their careers.
"We hear very few stories of people just stepping back in where they left off," said Joanne Brundage, executive director of Mothers & More, a Chicago-area support group for working women who postpone their careers to have children.
"Clearly, there is a price to be paid for not staying full-time, full-force in most professions," Brundage said. "I think women who are becoming mothers now have a different set of priorities than women did 15 to 20 years ago. Unfortunately, the message may change, but the environment stays the same."
It's a message Cynthia Aks wasn't prepared for. The first female surgeon to graduate from the residency program at Oakland General Hospital in Madison Heights, Mich., in 1990, Aks battled her share of discrimination from colleagues who didn't care to work with women surgeons, she said.
But after Aks, an emergency room surgeon, decided to have a family in her late 30s, she found it tough to regain the solid career footing she had before her triplets were born nearly 13 years ago. Forced to take seven months off for pregnancy complications, her contract was not renewed, she said, because the hospital didn't know how to deal with a female surgeon with children.
Aks resumed her career as a specialty surgeon, but at a huge cost: Her salary plummeted 60 percent.
"The perception is that you cannot juggle multiple hats effectively," said Aks, 49, who now owns a medical practice in Southgate, Mich. "I believe it's challenging, but you can. You can have high aspirations, be successful, have a family and still be involved. It's not equal for women, and I don't think it ever will be."
Southfield, Mich.-based accounting firm Plante & Moran offers tailored work arrangements such as seasonal work, telecommuting and contract employment to retain working mothers. The firm offers the options to management only.
"We want to accommodate people and their schedules," said Bill Bufe, partner and human resources director at the accounting firm. "We've had people who wanted to leave, but we wouldn't let them. We made things much more flexible for them and allowed them to continue to keep their toe in the water here and do what they needed to do in their family."
CHANGING FOCUS WHAT WOMEN CAN DO
WHAT WOMEN CAN DO
Tips for preparing to return to work:
Create a "re-entry" plan with specific goals
Foster a network for support while away from the work force
Volunteer while away and make sure that experience can be framed in business terms when you want to go back to work
Stay connected to colleagues
Maintain professional licenses and memberships and attend continuing education courses
Take classes to refresh knowledge and skills
Stay informed about the business implications of global and economic changes in your field
Secure contract work while away
Be realistic about how long it will take to re-enter the work force
Sources: Wharton Center for Leadership and Change, the Forte Foundation
CHANGING FOCUS
A survey of women returning to work after raising families found many shifted professional roles:
Accepted comparable or lower-level job: 83 percent
Changed industries: 61 percent
Changed functional role: 54 percent
Became self-employed: 45 percent

Pages
Let me rephrase:
Do you view a SAHM who is being supported by her husband as being a negative, selfish, irresponsible, unambitious, etc. option?
Would you consider someone who did hold such a stance to be prejudiced, anti-feminist, and militant?
Do you think families should have a variety of options to choose from?
Do you consider both WOHP's/WAHP's and SAHP's to be equally important? Especially, with regard to their respective roles/the work that they do?
<>
"Nope."
Well, that's certainly good to know :)
<>
"Yes. No. No. No. Elaborate about which question?"
On the questions you just answered of course. BTW, thanks for your responses.
"My family's personal funds? What do you think my family's personal funds are to say that they are no different than yours?"
Again, from post 706: "My family's personal funds are no differerent than your family's personal funds. Sure, the funding in and of itself may come from a variety of different sources but they are personal funds nonetheless."
<>
"No. No. N/A. I stayed at home with the kids"
Good answers!
<>
"Yes. Yes."
Again, thank you for your responses.
BTW, I have just one final question for you:
Do you think there is something inherently wrong with a SAHM who plans to make use of the family's personal funds in order to: get her Master's, self publish a book, record a cd, etc? TIA!
Wait a minute, not so fast there....just a few hours ago you
PumpkinAngel
Why is it good to know?
PumpkinAngel
Okay....Again,
PumpkinAngel
"I still don't follow how you find them of equal importance,"
I view my role/the work that I do as a SAHM to be equally important to my dh's role/the work that he does as a WAHD.
Do we have different roles/do different kinds of work? Yes.
Are these different roles/different kinds of work equal? Yes.
Do I think that mothers and fathers must have the same roles/do the same kinds of work in order to be considered equal? No.
Do I think WOHM's/WAHM's/SAHM's are equal? Yes.
Do I think WOHD's/WAHD's/SAHD's are equal? Yes.
WHat do you think:
Do I think that mothers and fathers must have the same roles/do the same kinds of work in order to be considered equal?
Do I think WOHM's/WAHM's/SAHM's are equal?
Do I think WOHD's/WAHD's/SAHD's are equal?
I asked about your view of commitment, not a law firm's.
But if you had stayed at your firm, and if you had made partner, you could have made a lot more money eventually. So clearly, even though you say you are ambitious, you are not as ambitious as some lawyers. Just as some part-timers may not be as ambitious, at least right now, as you are--but they could be more ambitious than you at other times of their lives. It's just not that black and white.
And I really can't see how "ambition," in and of itself, says anything about a person's commitment to their job. Maybe you are doing better work than the part-time people who work at your company, but then again, maybe you are just doing more of it.
I measure commitment to work much the same way you measure commitment to your children--by the quality of the work I do, not necessarily by the hours I spend there. I'd still like to hear your explanation as to why your commitment to work is greater than someone who works fewer hours, but someone who spends more time with their children doesn't have a greater commitment to them.
<> You're still limited to resumes that your firm obtains. Not a big deal. And certainly not an insult. Sheesh.
<<"I don't think any venture capitalist is likely to buy that terminology. I'm surprised you'd even present the client with such an inferior candidate." Yes you clearly know what you are talking about here. LOL.>>
Apparently that's your answer for everything. I'm sorry but I just don't think headhunting is all that complicated! But if that's the terminology that's out there these days, then I'm going to start saying I've been on a 7 yr-sabbatical. I usually just say the truth - I've been unemployed - but sabbatical just sounds so much prettier. Gotta love headhunters!
Pages