how do i convince my husband

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
how do i convince my husband
1841
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 4:09pm
how do i convince my husband to let me at least job-share so i can take care of our 3 month old dd? he grew up with his mom working & all his friend's moms working. we can afford it if we cut back on some things, but he doesn't want to cut back & just doesn't understand someone wanting to be a stay at home mom...it doesn't help mycause that the grandmothers will babysit. i'm so unhappy about having to go back to work...he wants me to work full time 1 more year & just doesn't get it! i feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest every time i hink about it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 9:15am
Yes.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 9:17am

My disagreement is applying the term homeschooling to normal every day activities of children. It is not what she considers educational. Life, in general, is educational. You can learn something every day. Today, in fact, I learned I should not keep the container of dog food near the house because a skunk will come up and try to get it and spray when challenged.


I don't see the need to label everything children do into an educational activity. I hate to be crude but, when my child poops, he poops. Simple. It is not an educational experience of the digestive system.


Your mileage may vary.


I think it takes up alot of time to try to label everything a child does into an educational experience. We have fun mocking it but it does create a certain sadness in me. Like Suzy said, a child should be able to be a child. There is a time to learn and a time to have fun.


"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 9:18am

"...controversial parenting choices - baby wearing, no bottles, co-sleeping..."


LTB, those choices only become controversial when she tries to play them off as "optimal" or "ideal" for ALL families, not just her own.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 9:36am
You really spend 6 to 8 hours a day, every day, doing WAHM stuff?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 9:44am
i agree ... i can spend six hours on a

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 10:00am

Hmm. Let's refresh your memory about the question you asked:

Pumpkinangel:
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Momofhk:
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In other words, Do have any scientific evidence or links to back up your opinion that, "It's only now in the last 50+ years that women have been allowed to focus on the mothering because most of the housework/work load has been lifted because of technology?">>

Savcal_ok:
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Momofhk:
<<"There is no scientific proof."

Exactly! Of course there is no scientific proof. Why? Because yet once again, we are talking about *opinions* here. Opinions, I might add, that cannot be backed up with scientific proof, hence the term *opinion*.

"Because it is obvious to anyone."

No, it is not obvious to anyone as opinions are clearly subjective, meaning dependent on the perceiver.>>

So unless I'm horribly mistaken, you asked for "scientific" proof of the changes that occured in the past 50+ years that have allowed mothers to focus on mothering, rather than housework/farmwork. Can you please explain how links to historical essays about the changes to women's roles during the Industrial Revolution are not relevant to the time period you were discussing? Let's see, maybe my math is wrong . . . 2005 minus 1890 equals 115. Nope. 115 definitely falls into 50+ years.

Jessica

Avatar for laurenmom2boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 10:02am
Doesn't the "mothering" and "WAHM stuff" overlap? You don't run errands with your kids? You don't cook and clean while mothering your kids?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 10:06am

You know, I agree with this to a large degree. (Religion being the opiate of the masses and all that). I'm an atheist, yet, I still do not feel the need to question the historical value of the Bible. The Bible has many fables, but it also depicts life at that time period. For example, Jesus may not have turned water into wine, but the depiction of the wedding is likely to be quite accurate . . . Kind of like Oliver Twist may be fiction, but allows the reader to gain valuable knowledge of 19th century England.

Jessica

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 10:13am

Based on the information she posts and your definitions, which I believe to be pretty standards ones, do you believe she is homeschooling her dd?


From post 1193 <

Active parenting- often child led educational activities undertaken as part of ones parenting- child enrolled in formal schooling. >>


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 08-10-2005 - 10:16am

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You really spend 6-8 hours each day doing household things?

PumpkinAngel

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