how do i convince my husband

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
how do i convince my husband
1841
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 4:09pm
how do i convince my husband to let me at least job-share so i can take care of our 3 month old dd? he grew up with his mom working & all his friend's moms working. we can afford it if we cut back on some things, but he doesn't want to cut back & just doesn't understand someone wanting to be a stay at home mom...it doesn't help mycause that the grandmothers will babysit. i'm so unhappy about having to go back to work...he wants me to work full time 1 more year & just doesn't get it! i feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest every time i hink about it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 2:49pm

"You don't believe in the objective superiority of your childrearing practices? Then what on earth have you been posting about without end?"

My personal subjective opinions on the matter :)

"Against all reason", as in logic or rational thought."

And how might I ask is breastfeeding (especially exclusively and on an extended basis), co-sleeping, babywearing, little to no use of susbstitute care, etc. "Against all reason", as in logic or rational thought?"

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 2:51pm
Hey, I'd consider

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 2:55pm

"Let me explain this SLOWLY. You brought the site up, I told you it appears biased it is up to YOU who wants it believed to prove it's not. One only need spend about two minutes on this site to know it has an agenda."

And what agenda is that?

"Find another objective one. None of us are going to accept what is printed on a biased site as fact."

I have posted another objective one. Remember the NICHD study? Why are you blatantly ignoring the fact that I HAVE ALREADY found/offered/posted another site?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 2:56pm

"Why, exactly, did you give up teaching? I mean, teaching more than just your dd?"

To SAH with my dd.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 3:02pm
What a great idea! My dd would love to make a homeschooling flag!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 3:05pm

"In fact, he's been out all evening looking at the moon and Mars through his super-dee-duper garage sale telescope AND making a map of the craters of the moon (which looks not a whole lot like the poster in his room done by professionals,"

What a great project! Sounds like you've got a really smart kid there!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 3:11pm

"I just have to say how wonderful it is that you can organize your summer days with some educational activities planned out which are led by your child's whims and curiosities."

Thank you! We certainly have a great deal of fun together.

"But whatever you call it, your DD is well-served in having such a passionate mom. It is your PASSION and love for your child that will carry her far!"

I hope so! But of course she's a pretty passionate person herself.

"Even what others here consider controversial parenting choices - baby wearing, no bottles, co-sleeping - can be resolved as secondary to a mothering which is clearly a priority for you and your DH and which I can "see" has yielded a rock-solid bond with your daughter - and that's what it's all about for me too!"

What a wonderful complement! Again, thank you :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 3:18pm

"Huh. I'd think Christianity would be right up your alley!"

Nope, no absolute truth for me LOL!

Again, I prefer Objective Scientific and Mathematical Truth myself, you know the kind that relies on logic, rational thought, and empirical evidence :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 3:22pm

"Well, if it's NOT news to you, then why did you post as if you had never heard of the fact that many people believe the Biblical narrative to be true,"

Again, I'm aware of the fact, "that many people believe the Biblical narrative to be true."

I just don't understand *WHY*.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Thu, 08-11-2005 - 4:00pm

"BTW, *I* didn't need him to be up. If he could have slept right through getting him dressed and into his snowsuit, I could have been a little less concerned about his bedtime (although he still would have had to be down around 8pm because that's when *I* needed to be in bed). But he couldn't, so to ensure he got sufficient sleep, he needed an earlier bedtime."

This is a perfect example of "convenience" parenting (a very common aspect of Western Parenting Practices I might add).

This type of parenting typically follows an *adult-led* schedule based primarily on the needs and convenience of *adults* (especially with regard to sleeping and feeding practices) rather than following a *child-led* schedule based on a *child's* individual biological needs.

In fact, you even go so far as to insist that this is *his* schedule rather than acknowleding that in reality, it is *yours*.

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