how do i convince my husband

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
how do i convince my husband
1841
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 4:09pm
how do i convince my husband to let me at least job-share so i can take care of our 3 month old dd? he grew up with his mom working & all his friend's moms working. we can afford it if we cut back on some things, but he doesn't want to cut back & just doesn't understand someone wanting to be a stay at home mom...it doesn't help mycause that the grandmothers will babysit. i'm so unhappy about having to go back to work...he wants me to work full time 1 more year & just doesn't get it! i feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest every time i hink about it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 10:03am

Absolutely- I think that most people (anyone who isn't among the Biblical literalist mindset which doesn't even encompass all of Christianity) would agree that the Bible is a collection of stories that, while historically accurate in many areas, are fictional/mythological/allegorical etc. I'm just saying that there is a wide literary berth that encompasses more than just "fiction/non-fiction" and that's where I think you're getting your disagreements from. Not that others are arguing that the Bible is literal truth (although some would argue that point) but that it's not fiction in the sense that it's a simple novel whose intent is exclusively entertainment...

Wytchy

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 10:16am

I'm just going along the same absolutist tack that you started with this statement: "Does your diet consist of only "ideal" foods? If not, at what age is it ok to give a child/person less than nutritionally optimal food?"

***Nope. But there's a spectrum in convenience. And for what purpose is that convenience necessary - to allow a parent to WOH or because a parent doesn't want to cook?***

IMO it ceases to be an issue of convenience when it becomes a matter of necessity.

Wytchy

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 10:40am

That's wonderful, but are you suggesting that this is a commonly seen situation for WOHM's?

Wytchy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 10:44am

"Then why do you keep asking about it? I didn't bring up the Bible's Creation story; you did."

Why do I discuss religion? To point out that there are many perspectives on the subject. Is there some reason why I shouldn't be entitled to discuss an alternative, non-Christian perspective of religion?

"If it's irrelevant to you and you want Christians to know that, you might try NOT asking about it."

How exacly would NOT asking about it, let Christians know that it is irrelevent to me?

BTW, I think the quote from post 1489, perfectly exemplifies the point I've been trying to get across here:

"A book intended to teach people how to live in relationship with a "Christian" God is irrelevent to those who aren't "Christians"

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 10:45am
I don't know of any situation where it's *not* permitted, and I work in a 24 hour shop.

Karen

"A pocketknife is like a melody;
sharp in some places,
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 11:06am

<>

"I don't understand your question in relation to the comments lois made. Can you explain where you're trying to go with this?"

Lois said that, The Creation Story reflected an ancient people's understanding of how the universe came to be. My respsonse was this:

<>

"the bible is thought to be the "Word of God" in that it teaches God's Word and is believed to be divinely inspired."

Yes, I understand that from a Christain perspective the bible is thought to be the "Word of God" or divinely inspired. However, I'm simply trying to point out that from a non-Christian perspective, the bible is thought to be the "Word of Man", meaning *not* divinely inspired.

"The point supposedly being debated here is whether daily life as depicted in the bible is accurate. Archeological and historical evidence suggests that it is."

Actually, there are several points being debated here, not just the one you mentioned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 11:15am

<< You are incorrect. I'm not trying to discredit "archeologically-verified daily life desriptions in the Bible." I'm simply trying to discredit the notion that the enitre bible is a "true", "real", "literal" work of non-fiction. >>

Which has exactly what relevance to this discussion?

It isn't relevent to the "archeologically-verified daily life desriptions in the Bible" discussion. I never said it was, nor was I posting in response to that particular discussion.

However, it is relevent to the "Fictional/Mythological stories of the bible" discussion which is the discussion that I was posting in response to.

Why are you seemingly ignoring the fact that there is more than one discussion regarding the bible going on here?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 11:21am

Yes- I do. Of course, not all of that is simple/basic cleaning/cooking :) Right now we're doing some remodelling and I'm working a bit on that as well as re-organizing/decluttering alot of stuff we've accumulated over the years (since it's been unearthed from the area we're re-doing) so that takes up a chunk of that time. Then there's the time I use to plan/prepare meals and snacks and plan/prepare/take dinners to the new Moms in the mothers club I belong to etc. (Unless you want to count that as WOH since I'm leaving the house *chuckle*- or as 'mothering' since I'm teaching the children about helping others...) Now, granted, after the remodelling and some of the other projects I'm working on are done and out of the way my 6-8hrs will probably be alot smaller, but that won't be for another year or two...

Wytchy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 11:22am

"So again, exactly who are you arguing with, and why?"

I'm not arguing with anyone. Discussing yes, but arguing no.

"No one here has said any of those stories are literal, factual, truths. In fact, they've gone to a great deal of trouble to explain the metaphorical meaning of those stories."

Literal or factual no, but true and real, yes. Do you see the dilemna here?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 11:35am

My kids are 19 mo. and 7mo. I generally *don't* run errands with them (at least things like grocery shopping etc.) right now because DS doesn't want to be contained in the cart and DD wants to be held constantly. I can't chase after DS holding DD in that setting so I try to do my errands when DH can be with them.

I do the cleaning with them- except the bathrooms or areas where it might be dangerous for them without constant-in-arms-range-supervision (they want to play in the toilet so I don't do bathrooms with them around) and depending on what I'm making I can do the cooking with them, but not always. (Hot stoves and constant stirring etc. don't make for child-friendly interlaps...)

As they get older there will be far more of an interlap possible between domestic chores and childcare. Unfortunately it makes it a bit more difficult having them so young and so close together in age (and having that annoying limitation of having only two eyes and four arms ;)

Wytchy

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