how do i convince my husband

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
how do i convince my husband
1841
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 4:09pm
how do i convince my husband to let me at least job-share so i can take care of our 3 month old dd? he grew up with his mom working & all his friend's moms working. we can afford it if we cut back on some things, but he doesn't want to cut back & just doesn't understand someone wanting to be a stay at home mom...it doesn't help mycause that the grandmothers will babysit. i'm so unhappy about having to go back to work...he wants me to work full time 1 more year & just doesn't get it! i feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest every time i hink about it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 12:38pm

Ok, I'll tag on.

 

Avatar for laurenmom2boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 12:53pm
Yeah, but you and your DH couldn't possibly be an *AVERAGE* dual WOH couple. The *AVERAGE* dual WOH couple couldn't *possibly* have all those days off and flexible schedules. <>
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 12:55pm

"Well, our teachers disagree. With the exception of special times, they don't want moms in the classroom everyday. They find it interferes with the learning process."

I find that a bit disconcerting. At my dd's school parents are encouraged to sign up at the beginning of the year specifically for volunteer programs in the classroom. Such as:

1. The one-on-one reading program (parents listen to/read with the kids one-on-one).

2. The book report program (parents discuss various book reports with the kids).

3. The volunteer art program (parents come in and do art projects with the kids).

4. The science project program (parents come in and do science projects with the kids).

BTW, I also do The Gifted&Talented volunteer program but that is with the G&T teacher in the G&T classroom.

"The kids needs instructional time with the teacher; not feel good time with mom. If they needed feel-good time with mom, why are they at school."

How is this an example of volunteering in the classroom?

"The parents (note I didn't say moms) that do volunteer generally do things that make the teacher more able to focus on classroom instruction; they prepare materials, make copies, decorate rooms, buy supplies, ... most of that is done in the workroom."

DD's school has this program as well, but it isn't considered an *in the classroom volunteer program*.

"Parental involvement is VERY necessary. But involvement *in the classroom* isn't necessary .."

Well, it is at my dd's school LOL :) And again, it was something I very much appreciated, valued, and encouraged as a teacher in my own classroom.

"and, as explained above, is often considered inappropriate."

What you are describing is clearly not an example of volunteering in the classroom.

"Why does doing that with a SAHP make it more developmentally appropriate?"

I was thinking of child/adult ratios when it comes to infants, toddlers, and preschoolers. FOr instance, IMO it would be much easier to keep up with and have an enjoyable learning experience with 1 child as a SAHP (or say 4 children of different ages for those who have more than one child), than 1:4 infants, 1:6 toddlers, or 1:10-12 preschoolers, as a substitute caregiver.

"And why would a WOHP not be able to do that too?"

We were talking specifically about summer break during which most dual WOHP's work.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 12:57pm

"Aren't twins normally born one at a time....therefore one would be older than the other? I would think anywhere from a few minutes to maybe hours."

Yes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 1:01pm
Glad to hear your doggie is doing better.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 1:03pm
You know, I was reading momofhk's post, trying to figure out if DH and I are above average or below average.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 1:08pm

Personally.....I don't want to be average, do you?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 1:09pm

"I forget....how long do you exclusively breastfeed (no bottles/cups) your dd? According to these websites they say that a infant should be fed breastmilk exclusively for 4-6 months."

My dd started using a cup at 5 months, but continued to bf well over 3 years until she self-weaned. BTW, there is some confusion regarding bf older children. Here's a link on the topic.

http://www.parentingweb.com/lounge/ext_nursepage.htm

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 1:11pm

So now you know what she means when she says one of the twins is older.


Your welcome.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 1:13pm

Thanks, but I am not confused about bfeeding older children.

PumpkinAngel

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