how do i convince my husband

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
how do i convince my husband
1841
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 4:09pm
how do i convince my husband to let me at least job-share so i can take care of our 3 month old dd? he grew up with his mom working & all his friend's moms working. we can afford it if we cut back on some things, but he doesn't want to cut back & just doesn't understand someone wanting to be a stay at home mom...it doesn't help mycause that the grandmothers will babysit. i'm so unhappy about having to go back to work...he wants me to work full time 1 more year & just doesn't get it! i feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest every time i hink about it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:37pm

Why not do both? Breastfeeding is protective, so is acquiring minor illnesses earlier. Probably for very different reasons. Bmilk provides some antibodies, minor illnesses stimulate the child's own production of antibodies. And, btw, bfing and work status do not correlate (rates are similar among women SAH versus return to work).

"What is the benefit of exposing infants and toddlers to an increased number of illnesses via group day care? What is the benefit of increasing the number of actual illnesses they contract via group day care?"

Um...didn't the studies I linked you to answer this question?

"Are you suggesting that it is *natural* for young children to be in group care, cared for substitutes who are unrelated to them, for long periods of time? How so?"

Yes, it is natural for children to be cared for in groups situations, humans are afterall, biologically determined to be social creatures. And since we have evolved in groups, the ability of group contact to boost immune system development seems quite consistent with optimal health.

I describe your lifestyle as "semi-secluded" (paticularly in reference to your DD's early years) because of the details you yourself have shared.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2005
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:39pm
from my experience in two states, the school parking lots were purposely designed in a U shape because of school traffic. i can understand designated parking spots for staff only but to prohibit the parking lot from parents and make it exclusive only to staff seems a bit extreme..where do you park to pick up your child for a doctor apptmt? where do you park for a class program? do you fight for street space or run the chance of walking the extra distance?.....that would bother me.
Avatar for laurenmom2boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:40pm
Are you the board "paid time off" police? Just because you have little experience with corporate benefits and time off doesn't mean anyone is stretching the truth. You accused me of "stretching the truth" (aka lying) as well. Which I wasn't (I provided you my schedule). Yet you continue to grasp at straws and accuse people of stretching the truth just because they don't fit your neat little stereotypical view of the world. So because you can't refute someone's claim, you accuse them of "stretching the truth?" What a crock of bull.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:41pm
translation: You are right and I was wrong.....
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2005
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:44pm
oiur elementary school stops at 5 too.....up north, it stops at grade 6..i would fight for that extra year if i could. 5th graders, going into 6th, seem still so young to me. maybe my attitude will change once i have r/l students that age. lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:46pm

That was my interpretation as well.


PumpkinAngel

Avatar for laurenmom2boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:47pm

Because she can't prove you wrong, you must be stretching the truth. Because she doesn't have anything to back up her opinion. Because it's easier to accuse someone stretching the truth than to come up with an intelligent, reasonable answer. Because it's easier than admitting she's wrong.

Shall I go on? ;-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:50pm

"young infants and children certainly do not need to go to dc in order for this to occur."

All kids get some amount of exposure to minor bacterial and viral illnesses. The point is that children in group care (or with olderr siblings, ie group care at home) get exposed to *more*. And, consequently, derive benefits from that exposure.

Weekly trips to the grocery store and most likely not equivalent.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:51pm

All the public schools in our area stop at 5th grade with only the private schools going to 6th.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:54pm

It isn't a bit extreme at all. DD's school is small. The parking lot is small. And it is dead center of a tightly packed residential area with no room for expansion. You couldn't have a U shaped parking lot here if you tried.

"Where do you park to pick up your child for a doctor appointment? Where do you park for a class program? Do you fight for street space or run the chance of walking the extra distance?" Both. You fight for street space and sometimes wind up walking the extra distance. But since the school is in a tightly packed residential area, there are many side streets and the distance you have to walk is rarely more than 2 blocks.

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