how do i convince my husband

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2004
how do i convince my husband
1841
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 4:09pm
how do i convince my husband to let me at least job-share so i can take care of our 3 month old dd? he grew up with his mom working & all his friend's moms working. we can afford it if we cut back on some things, but he doesn't want to cut back & just doesn't understand someone wanting to be a stay at home mom...it doesn't help mycause that the grandmothers will babysit. i'm so unhappy about having to go back to work...he wants me to work full time 1 more year & just doesn't get it! i feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest every time i hink about it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:18am
18th century is 1700s.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:24am

Right- but human invention isn't always the best or most beneficial. In this instance, breastfeeding by a biological mother is *most* beneficial. Will other means of infant feeding kill the kid? Probably not- but it wasn't always that sure a thing. I'm certainly not suggesting that human invention is a "bad" thing- far from it. I'm just offering a reminder of our history as a species. IMO I don't think we crawled out of the muck with the knowledge that "oh hey- we can just nurse each others offspring or feed them milk from the cows (or mammoths ;) that we haven't domesticated yet"... ;)

Wytchy

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:25am

Yes- still pretty recent history. (For the record- I was looking at the dates referenced in the articles).

Wytchy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:46am
Why wouldn't people have been able to figure that out lol? We may think highly of ourselves, but we are simply animals, too. People can look around and see plenty of examples of animals taking in offspring not their own, why wouldn't it occur to humans to do the same? How long do you think it took for a woman to pick up a baby of a dead mother and nurse it herself? Given that babies also often died, babyless, lactating women and motherless infants have most likely never been uncommon.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:47am

<>

*MY* school is not *entirely dependent* upon standardization, in testing or other methods. They do standardized testing, but it isn't the only thing they use when determining curriculum."

You make a good point. Perhaps "entirely dependent" is too strong a phrase, "very dependent" would proabaly be more accurate.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:49am

"I think rote learning and memorization is important in some areas. Multiplication tables, for instance. Yes, it's important to understand *why* 6x6 is 36, but being able to pull that number off the top of your head is important too. (JMO)"

I agree. Indeed rote learning and memorization is important in some areas.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:51am

"Historically? Yes. Modern civilization has obviously found ways around that, but our species is biologically intended to be fed at the breast. (Mammals, remember? ;) Wetnurses became an option as an advent of necessity (mother died) and later as convenience/status for the wealthy, but the biological norm is that mammalian offspring be fed at their mothers breast. Historically, if they weren't, they'd starve. Thankfully we've found ways to circumvent that, but one cannot ignore our biological roots as a mammalian species. ;)"

Very well said!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:54am

"Yes- they could. However, nature intended for the offspring of the species to nurse from their own mothers. Just because we "can" do something doesn't necessarily mean that it's the best thing to do. It also doesn't mean that 'any lactating woman' would be found who was able or willing to share her milk with a child that wasn't her own."

Yes! Finally, someone who gets it :)

"Women working away from their infant offspring is really a relatively recent historical change- perhaps not recent in the terms of what we think of as "recent" as in last decade etc. but recent in terms of how long humanity has been in existance."

You're absolutely right. WOHM's *is* "a relatively recent historical change".

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 11:56am

<,but just wanted to stress that not all parents take their kids to school "to be with mom sooner". >>


Good. Cause I didn't state that. I stated my observations at *my* school ...

The JACKAL


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Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Wed, 08-03-2005 - 12:00pm
Very dependent still wouldn't be accurate for my school.

The JACKAL


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Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

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