How do you do it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
How do you do it?
1345
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 8:31pm
I hope I don't start a big controversy, but this is a debate board right?

I just have to ask those working moms....How do you do it?????

I am a Step-mom to two boys ages 6 and 9. I have a three year old that has been in minimal nursery school since he was one. He only goes three days a week for a couple of hours.

My step-sons BM (birth mother) just had a baby with her BF and this is her schedule:

She drops my step-sons at school to the morning-care program at 7:15AM (school starts at 8:45AM). She then drives her three month old baby to an in-home sitter that has five or six other kids at 7:45AM and then goes to work. She picks the baby up at 6:00PM and then she picks my SS up from after-care at 6:15PM (their school is over at 3:10PM). So my ss's are at school each day for 11 hours and the three month old baby is at a sitters for 10 hours each day!

Doesn't that seem like a lot! I just don't understand this. I offered to watch my SS's and she let me for two weeks and then got mad at my DH and put them back in the scholl child care program.

Why would you bother having children if someone else is going to raise them for you?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 2:35am
This is absolutely ridiculous. Step mom just because your parenting style differs from her's doesn't mean custody should be reversed.

You sound very jealous.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 2:37am
Actually the older they get the more child care costs and it's harder to find child care. So yes he should pay more.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 2:43am
SAHM2004 Father's rights what about the mother's right. You are trying to take away her children for being responsible. For working and providing for her children. b
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 2:57am
SAHM2004:

Your argument takes the cake. You put your son in nursery school which equates to daycare for some children. You leave your son with a friend during college. Which is also daycare maybe in home yet you are griping about what she is doing. That is very hypocritical.

You just busted your argument. I have been reading all these posts and what sticks out is your vindictiveness. Also the fact that both your husband and yourself think that you are both superior parents and try to take the children from their mother who I bet loves those children very much. And they love her. Maybe you saw them arguing and fighting. I fought with my parents when I grew up and that didn't mean I didn't love them I love them an inordinate amount. At this point it sickens me to see you being so evil and that is what it is. To try to destroy the relationship between the mother and those children is dispictable.

b
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 3:04am
Virgo he is only an E6 did they raise that yet? That isn't much money for all that he has to endure and do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 3:13am
As for my children's daycare having different morals, values, and ethics than I do, not so much. Except for that time they were training my children to knock over liquor stores, we really haven't had a problem with philosophical differences. I mean, how many times do I have to tell them, "Forget liquor stores, the real money is in convenience stores."


Hey, at least they were learning some kind of "work skills".

I love your sense of humor:)


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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 3:15am
Ahlmommy:

There is absolutely no way under the sun that my ex an his now ex wife or any new wife would had access to picking up my child. He has the visitation not her. Flat out. When he was married to the second one this became an argument we took in front of the judge. She was banned from being at court hearings, from picking up and dropping off my child she wasn't allowed in the home at those times. If she violated that he got contempt and would lose visitation schedule and would go back to supervised with me.

So to answer you as a custodial parent the step parent doesn't have the right to pick up that child if it's not agreed upon. The same goes with watching. The step mother watched my child while visitation and he worked. So I took that in. If he wanted visitation it was to be with him not the step parent. Until he could resolve his work schedule and be physically there the schedule was modified.

So the court can do a great many things in regards to step parents and interference of relationships. Which seems to be the case in the original post.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 3:39am
SAHM2004:

Your comment about the boyfriend , and basically you each parent can argue about those other influences in court . And there can be rulings in regard to it. Morality is part of the revised code. Since you go to father's right groups I am sure you are aware of the revised code that dictates the laws that govern visitation and custody. Or maybe not since you lost custody before.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 3:47am
SpongeBob is a cartoon character who is, of all things, a kitchen sponge. He "lives in a pineapple under the sea/absorbent and yellow and porous is he." Full name of the show is SpongeBob Squarepants. It's a wacky, wry cartoon with a lot of fun for grownups that is sometimes overlooked because of its tremendous appeal to kids.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Sun, 12-21-2003 - 3:50am
Cocoapop:

So what they are snow boots. Good shoes works just as well. My daughter has snow boots but her feet grow faster than weeds and I can't keep her in shoes she is surpasing everyone's. I hate boots. They make your feet smelly and they don't really keep them warm. And I advise her when looking at boots, and shoes to get shoes and take other shoes.

She has an old set to play in the snow that were mine but she never did much of it cause it was cold and she doesn't like it. We have everything shoveled for when she goes to school so she can wear regular shoes.

So what is the deal with boots. They stink.

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