How do you do it?
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| Fri, 12-12-2003 - 8:31pm |
I just have to ask those working moms....How do you do it?????
I am a Step-mom to two boys ages 6 and 9. I have a three year old that has been in minimal nursery school since he was one. He only goes three days a week for a couple of hours.
My step-sons BM (birth mother) just had a baby with her BF and this is her schedule:
She drops my step-sons at school to the morning-care program at 7:15AM (school starts at 8:45AM). She then drives her three month old baby to an in-home sitter that has five or six other kids at 7:45AM and then goes to work. She picks the baby up at 6:00PM and then she picks my SS up from after-care at 6:15PM (their school is over at 3:10PM). So my ss's are at school each day for 11 hours and the three month old baby is at a sitters for 10 hours each day!
Doesn't that seem like a lot! I just don't understand this. I offered to watch my SS's and she let me for two weeks and then got mad at my DH and put them back in the scholl child care program.
Why would you bother having children if someone else is going to raise them for you?

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She did answer the question. The kids were in daycare when Mom and Dad were still married, but not for as long. I think she said 7 hours a day.
"The thing is this mom there has 3 children and a husband and she is working contributing."
No husband. She has a live-in boyfriend, who is the father of the third child. And we still don't know if he's paying for anything.
"As far as the child hitting the mother on the field please. That child is first upset because mom and dad divorce. Dad remarries and has a wife and I would wager himself that is sending out vibes to the child about their true feelings."
And you don't think this child could be acting out over having a new baby in the house and a new "father-figure"? Why does it have to be the step-mom's fault?
You can view it any way you want to, but rather seeing an "evil stepmother" here, I'm seeing a person that is frustrated that her husbands children are spending so much time in daycare, when she could care for them. And I bet if you went to a step-family support board, you would find more people that consider steps as family, rather than intruders.
Shannon
Yeah, me too. Then maybe she would get a different job or SAH and spend more than an hour a day with her children. You can't really think that little amount of time is healthy?
Shannon
Shannon
It's really as simple as that.
And given the invective this stepmom has used to describe the biomom, I find it difficult to understand who could fault the biomom from being reluctant to leave her children in the care of someone who hates and lacks any basic respect for their mother.
Got it now? Where on earth does it get to 50 below anyway?
Shannon
My son's stepmom is an awesome wonderful woman, but I think that because she DOESN'T indulge the malicious behavior we've witnessed in this stepmom. I think she's wonderful because she ACTUALLY (and actively) supported my parenting AND my authority as the parent with the ability to make decisions she had no voice in, as opposed to the lip service this stepmom here claims to give but gives no evidence of.
It's probably not ALL the stepmom's fault in this instance. But similarly, none of us believe it is entirely the fault of the biomom, either, which is what the stepmom has been selling from the first post. More than one poster here has said they don't agree with everything the biomom has done; they simply don't believe that the biomom is the only person in this situation that bears fault, blame and responsibility for the fact that the situation is bad. And rather than acknowledge the possibility she might have contributed to the situation, even if unintentionally, the stepmom refuses to accept ANY responsibility and refuses to accept her dh might hold some as well. And that, more than all the rest combined are why so few here are sympathetic to the stepmom; situations like this simply don't go bad because of the total evilness of one player and the complete and utter innocence and sainthood of the other two players.
Shannon
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