How do you view "Fatherhood"

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2010
How do you view "Fatherhood"
147
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 9:08pm
How involved should men be with their children and how involved ARE men (in reality) involved with their children?
Please indicate if you have children and you are speaking from personal experience. I think it would also be interesting to see how each gender views this topic, so please also indicate if you're male or female.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Tue, 03-23-2010 - 6:29am
Is this for a project?
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2009
Tue, 03-23-2010 - 12:07pm

Iam a mom and iam speaking personally,


Avatar for mommy2amani
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-23-2010 - 2:41pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2009
Tue, 03-23-2010 - 6:00pm

Thats a really good point.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2007
Tue, 03-23-2010 - 6:18pm

"How involved should men be with their children and how involved ARE men (in reality) involved with their children?"

I think men should have a good relationship with their children. How that relationship looks like for that particular family, and how the child care tasks are divided for that family, depends on the needs and desires of that family. I don't believe there is one best way of child rearing for all families.

In my family, the father does most of the child care tasks, and he has a GREAT relationship with my 1 year old son. My husband is a stay at home dad. Should he at some point choose to work full time, then child care tasks would be done equally. I work full time and also enjoy a great relationship with my son, and am thrilled he can have so much time with his daddy. I get lots of one on one time when I am home, and also split the necessary tasks (diapers, etc) with my husband when we are together.



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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2009
Tue, 03-23-2010 - 10:40pm

I got to thinking aobut his after talking to a gf on the phone who pays her baby sitter's between 10-15 a hour depending on how many kids, how long and time of day/ evening.

Avatar for mommy2amani
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-24-2010 - 7:24am

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2009
Wed, 03-24-2010 - 9:11am

Fair enough, Im paying that much cuz he is my son and its going to his college fund, his band, his

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Wed, 03-24-2010 - 3:10pm

I would say the newest generation of fathers is more involved than the last generation, but there is a lot of variation in individual situations. Some dads are hands off, some dads are MIA, some dads are at every meal and ever ball game, and there's a lot in between.

My two kids dad's are very involved in their lives, at least compared to all of our parents. They seem to get more involved as the kids get older.

In any case, there's no right answer. What works for one family might be a disaster situation for another family. Thank goodness my dad didn't try to be as involved as my dh and ex are, it would have been scarier than it already was with the very little that he did do.

I do think having a dad be too disconnected or out of the picture can often (not always) cause lower self esteem in children (this is true for mom being too disconnected or out of the picture as well).

"The last of human freedoms - the ability to choose one's attitude in a given set of circumstances." - Viktor Frankl.



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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Fri, 03-26-2010 - 6:50am
my husband has a demanding career, works alot, travels some, too but is very involved with the kids.

 

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