How does this relate to the debate?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
How does this relate to the debate?
2771
Wed, 08-20-2003 - 7:56pm
Hey I rhymed! lol

Something occurred to me earlier and I wanted to see how others thought it might relate to the whole "which is harder SAH/WOH" portion of the debate that crops up so often.

I think that, when you look at either group *as a whole*, the WOHs might have it harder. And this is why ...

There are virtually no SAHMs who SAH because they "have to". There are virtually no SAHMs who are forced to SAH. A woman that SAH wants to SAH.(I'm sure there's a few exceptions out there; controlling dhs who MAKE their wives SAH, disabled children, etc) A woman that SAH doesn't hate her "job", or else she'd go get a WOH job. A woman that SAH is generally getting what she wants.

There are LOTS AND LOTS of WOHMs who WOH because they "have to". A single mom, or one whose dh doesn't make enough to support the family, or one with a disabled dh, whatever the case may be ... she may long, with all her heart, to SAH, but *can't*. Many WOHMs hate their jobs, but can't quit.

Anyhoo ... just wanted to stir up something new

Hollie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:27pm
Yes you did. Otherwise you would have left it the way it was. No matter. It spoke VOLUMES about you. Better get to bed you mom will be coming home soon ;)
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:31pm
<>

Do you use outline view? I ask because you so often don't seem to remember what posts people are addressing.

This particular sub-thread is in regards to your contention that simply validating stereotypes in no way indicated that you agreed with them. Your argument was that we all ought to KNOW that you didn't agree with particular comments, even though you gave no indication that you didn't agree with them.

Your post responding to those stereotypical remarks was unclear. It was unclear because you gave a figurative "thumbs up" to those remarks, and yet later claimed that you didn't agree with them. If you had indicated *in any way* that you didn't intend to validate the comments by claiming they were valid, then there wouldn't have been any confusion.

Of course, this is just one example, and the one that happened to spawn this particular sub-thread. There have been numerous other examples throughout this thread - enough that I mistakenly assumed you would understand the concept being addressed. My mistake - I should have been more explicit.

Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:32pm
I don't think anyone has to try to back you into a corner. I think you do a fine job of it all on your own.
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:34pm
You do know you're talking to yourself, right?
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:36pm
Many of us debate from our own experience. Unless you're going to debate whether or not her 7-year-old really can make a cohesive sentence, she's not really dragging her child into anything, anyway.

Looks like someone is in that corner again...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:37pm
Thanks! Too weird. I am still hedging toward jr high kid.....What do you think? Because if this is an adult doing this....scary stuff.
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:37pm
5 words. You asked how many words, she answered you.

And you wondered why I asked if you were having difficulty following the board format...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:38pm
Would you please grow up how old are you anyway...what speaks volumes is i have the freedom to speak as i please and edit out as i please. My identity is mine if i edit or i dont, i may express my opinion as i choose and if you think who iam by the internet speaks "VOLUMES" you are shallow!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:40pm
I agree with you and that is why i believe that it goes both ways for all WOH SAH WAH and providers. We all work for different reason's.


Edited 8/27/2003 11:43:32 PM ET by silverunity
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 11:41pm
As I've said (twice), it would mean that you have bought into the stereotypes expressed.

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