How does this relate to the debate?
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| Wed, 08-20-2003 - 7:56pm |
Something occurred to me earlier and I wanted to see how others thought it might relate to the whole "which is harder SAH/WOH" portion of the debate that crops up so often.
I think that, when you look at either group *as a whole*, the WOHs might have it harder. And this is why ...
There are virtually no SAHMs who SAH because they "have to". There are virtually no SAHMs who are forced to SAH. A woman that SAH wants to SAH.(I'm sure there's a few exceptions out there; controlling dhs who MAKE their wives SAH, disabled children, etc) A woman that SAH doesn't hate her "job", or else she'd go get a WOH job. A woman that SAH is generally getting what she wants.
There are LOTS AND LOTS of WOHMs who WOH because they "have to". A single mom, or one whose dh doesn't make enough to support the family, or one with a disabled dh, whatever the case may be ... she may long, with all her heart, to SAH, but *can't*. Many WOHMs hate their jobs, but can't quit.
Anyhoo ... just wanted to stir up something new
Hollie

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At least now I know where you're coming from when you claim everyone else is confusing you.
Shallow? Well, you're the one who wrote the scathing post to Eileen. Not me. But *shallow* isn't the word I would use to describe that post.
unity^
Edited 8/28/2003 8:56:41 AM ET by silverunity
Both sides will debate this for years to come.
I did not read all 1700+ posts, but from what I read, I have to say that both have pro's and con's.
I am a SAHM by choice. My choice is to do what I know from experience is right for my family. My choice is not hand over my check for childcare. I did the math and thats what would happen. The good paying jobs are farther to drive and require business attire. So throw that in with childcare for 4 year old twins (daycares eyeballs light up when u say "Twins")and afterschool care for 10 year old. It's just not possible. I could work afternoons when my huz gets home and put more stress on my household. I tried that too. I could drag along the nebulizer to the daycare and pray they know what there doing. Hope my boss understands when that treatment don't work and I need to take him to Triage for a steroid treatment. I could have the car payments and the big house payment that we have to work 60 hours a week to have and not be home to enjoy it.
Some of these reports are not ones that I have seen personally that support WOH moms.
I do know those reports don't tell the whole picture.
Think about the kids of today compared to what we were doing.
The majority of people that I have spoken with or personally know agree that staying home with your child is a plus if its possible.
I have become a Work at Home Mom so I can supplement the income and health benefits for my family. (Hey, I am online anyway right? May as well get paid for it) Doing what is right for your individual situation is the best choice. If it works, great!! If it don't, change it. I did.
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