How does this relate to the debate?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
How does this relate to the debate?
2771
Wed, 08-20-2003 - 7:56pm
Hey I rhymed! lol

Something occurred to me earlier and I wanted to see how others thought it might relate to the whole "which is harder SAH/WOH" portion of the debate that crops up so often.

I think that, when you look at either group *as a whole*, the WOHs might have it harder. And this is why ...

There are virtually no SAHMs who SAH because they "have to". There are virtually no SAHMs who are forced to SAH. A woman that SAH wants to SAH.(I'm sure there's a few exceptions out there; controlling dhs who MAKE their wives SAH, disabled children, etc) A woman that SAH doesn't hate her "job", or else she'd go get a WOH job. A woman that SAH is generally getting what she wants.

There are LOTS AND LOTS of WOHMs who WOH because they "have to". A single mom, or one whose dh doesn't make enough to support the family, or one with a disabled dh, whatever the case may be ... she may long, with all her heart, to SAH, but *can't*. Many WOHMs hate their jobs, but can't quit.

Anyhoo ... just wanted to stir up something new

Hollie

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2001
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:28pm
>>"the person who assumes one is sterotypical is basically the guitly one.<<" That reminds me of elementary schoolage kid's arguing out in the playground during recess ... bantering back and forth until their argument falls apart so they resort to "I'm rubber and you're glue what you say bounces off me and sticks to you."

Not debating here, just making an observation.

Linda

 

Linda - wife, mother, grandmum                     &nb

Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:28pm
Hmmmm...I think unity has lived up to her name.

You and I actually agree on something!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:29pm
Perhaps a make over or a day at the spa will do YOU some good. I cant imagine falling on that stone.

take care~

Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:29pm
No one called you a stereotype.

Funny how you exhibit the exact behavior you condem in others. Almost like a child repeating everything someone says.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2001
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:32pm
Oh Beth ... you too? Not that I was fed those particular academics would get me places ... but more I was fed art wouldn't. We'll have our day soon, you and me.

Linda

 

Linda - wife, mother, grandmum                     &nb

Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:32pm
OMG! I laughed so hard I think I hurt something!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:34pm
I was fairly non-materialistic when I met my husband, and he is also fairly non-materialistic. We live in a ranch home in a middle-class neighborhood. DH drives a Geo Metro and I drive a 2000 Plymouth Voyager. I haven't bought any new clothes other than shoes in five years (and I have two pairs of shoes right now), and we don't have a cell phone, cable TV, or internet service....that's what I meant by being "non-materialistic." If I "needed" a lot in the way of material goods, we wouldn't have met our financial goals. We have been pretty aggressive savers all of our lives. My kids will get an inheritance from their grandparents and great-grandparents, but it won't be "millions" each. But yes, even though we could "kick it up a notch" and make another 50,000 a year through "getting to the top of our professions," we realized that we had enough. I liked lukeslawmom's answer to the question -- she has a definite understanding of what she wants and "when" she will have achieved it. Some people don't -- they just think that they need more and more and more. And since you felt the need to throw in what you might have thought was a nasty little dig, yes, maybe you should have married somebody twenty years older, if that's who you fell in love with. My DH is only 14 years older than I, but if he'd been 20 years older than I was, I'd have married him anyway. He's that special.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:34pm
as does..."your dead on" Common sense should tell you... to call someone a name expecially on a internet board is elementary and joining the kids on the playground to do it.
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:35pm
Perhaps you didn't understand the definition?

Of course, you didn't only say her points were valid, you said they were GREAT. Care to explain how that comment indicates you disagreed with them?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-28-2003 - 2:37pm
if they learn to manage their own money at a young age, chances are that won't happen.

But if they're always given everything they want, and are accustomed to the appearance that money just flows and flows, they might be income less at 35.

Just one more reason I want my kids to see that I don't have it all.

Hollie

Pages