How does this relate to the debate?
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| Wed, 08-20-2003 - 7:56pm |
Something occurred to me earlier and I wanted to see how others thought it might relate to the whole "which is harder SAH/WOH" portion of the debate that crops up so often.
I think that, when you look at either group *as a whole*, the WOHs might have it harder. And this is why ...
There are virtually no SAHMs who SAH because they "have to". There are virtually no SAHMs who are forced to SAH. A woman that SAH wants to SAH.(I'm sure there's a few exceptions out there; controlling dhs who MAKE their wives SAH, disabled children, etc) A woman that SAH doesn't hate her "job", or else she'd go get a WOH job. A woman that SAH is generally getting what she wants.
There are LOTS AND LOTS of WOHMs who WOH because they "have to". A single mom, or one whose dh doesn't make enough to support the family, or one with a disabled dh, whatever the case may be ... she may long, with all her heart, to SAH, but *can't*. Many WOHMs hate their jobs, but can't quit.
Anyhoo ... just wanted to stir up something new
Hollie

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Just an aside but one of my favorite gadgets of bygone years is called a baby tender. It's a box with a slit at the top so baby can get air. Baby can just pull up and peek over the top. Moms put mobile babies in them while they were working so they wouldn't get near the fire. How's that for quality time, lol. Moms simply have not had the kind of time we do today. Today's WM has more time to spend with her kids than moms of past generations did. That's all the proof I need that my kids don't need me home.
I'd be just as happy for my dd to be the manager of the local shoe store as I would for her to be a lawyer ... as long as she's happy doing it and being a mature, responsible adult.
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Its not that hard. I encourage their drive to succedd at what THEY WANT TO DO .. not at what I WANT THEM TO DO.
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Nope. I have a good life. If theirs is no better, they'll still be happy and mature and responsible. That's enough. In fact, they could have less than I do and I'd still be happy and proud of/for them.
Maybe YOU can't do it, in your chose locale with your chosen lifestyle. But MANY MANY MANY people can and do every day. And those people are no less happy than you. They are no less special than you. They are no less valuable than you.
Hollie
Why would you assume that she's (well, her dh) not going to be able to support her family in the future?
That's just a truly odd, and poor, assumption.
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