How does this relate to the debate?
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| Wed, 08-20-2003 - 7:56pm |
Something occurred to me earlier and I wanted to see how others thought it might relate to the whole "which is harder SAH/WOH" portion of the debate that crops up so often.
I think that, when you look at either group *as a whole*, the WOHs might have it harder. And this is why ...
There are virtually no SAHMs who SAH because they "have to". There are virtually no SAHMs who are forced to SAH. A woman that SAH wants to SAH.(I'm sure there's a few exceptions out there; controlling dhs who MAKE their wives SAH, disabled children, etc) A woman that SAH doesn't hate her "job", or else she'd go get a WOH job. A woman that SAH is generally getting what she wants.
There are LOTS AND LOTS of WOHMs who WOH because they "have to". A single mom, or one whose dh doesn't make enough to support the family, or one with a disabled dh, whatever the case may be ... she may long, with all her heart, to SAH, but *can't*. Many WOHMs hate their jobs, but can't quit.
Anyhoo ... just wanted to stir up something new
Hollie

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Unfortunately, my grandfather was born in this country and his parents wanted to assimilate, so I doubt even he remembers any Swedish words (and I don't know any - what a pity).
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Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14
My boys don't know where the money comes from. Heck, they don't even know that we pay a mortgage bill each month so we can live in our house. Sure, Daddy, may pay for the house, their clothes, food and toys, but Mommy is the one who keeps their house and clothes clean and makes their food and plays with their toys. Which do you think is more prevalent in a 2 or 5yo's mind?
Things change when they get older. For now, I want my kids oblivious to any money concerns we may have.
>>>but why the heck would she be unwillingly picking up slack for any friends or acquaintances, regardless of work status?<<<
One thought I have on this is some friends or acquaintances, especially if they are family, are too demanding. I had to completely STOP helping my sister out at one point because it got to such an extreme level of expectations from her. Because I SAH, I should have had unlimited time to keep her kid or take him here or there or do this or that. I'm not saying every WOHP is like that, they aren't....heck, some SAHPs are like that, but having one or two people like that in your life (especially if they are family and you can't just "drop" the friendship) can really frustrate you. And if you aren't careful, it can color the way you see others who fit into the "catagory" (SAHP, WOHP, Single Parent, Married Parent, etc) that person making demands upon you does.
Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14
Laura
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Laura
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