How Has Your Status Affected Your...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
How Has Your Status Affected Your...
54
Wed, 09-12-2007 - 5:11pm
marriage/romantic relationship(s)? (Pulling this out of another thread since it's a great topic)

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I am unable ot give legal or medical advice. My opinions are based on my experiences and my personal research.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Wed, 09-12-2007 - 6:57pm

in my previous relationship (married for almost 15 years), he was quite disrespectful of my job as a teacher and he was a very selfish parent.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Wed, 09-12-2007 - 8:31pm

I have no idea.

Avatar for cindytree
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 09-12-2007 - 9:02pm

Interesting question!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2006
Wed, 09-12-2007 - 9:19pm

Tough question to answer since I can't compare my marriage with and without me working.

Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-12-2007 - 11:21pm

I don't think it has.


I was a career person when I met my husband -- 13 years ago -- and I'm a career person now. When I took a big chunk of time off to travel with him, and, when our kids were born, it didnt change our relationship. I really don't think my working status *has* effected our relationship in any significant way.
From time to time it effects us short term, like when I am working insane hours -- but we both have had high pressure / high reward roles so I think we both empathize with the other.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-13-2007 - 2:08am

To answer my own question-

In my first marriage, I was a SAHM other than the years I worked as a pre-school teacher but took my two kids who were at home at the time with me to my job. (I always think that parents who take their children to work with them should have their own classification.) My xh was severely abusive so it's no great surprise that he was totally disrespectful of me no matter what I did. However, some of his family members did come to my side during the divorce to tell me that I had definitely done my share in saving us money through all my work at home. To me, that spoke volumes.

With my current dh, I have worked on and off during our marriage of almost 8 years. I WOH for one year. The remainder of the time, I mostly WAH. I have worked as a dcp AH. I am now a special education advocate and consultant. It's not a booming business simply because many parents who have sped kiddos can't afford to hire an advocate, but it's fulfilling. I won't get rich doing it; that's for sure.

We are currently getting started on my immigrating to Canada since that is where my dh is a citizen, what the plan has been for the last 10 years, and is certainly where I want to be. Once we make that move, everything changes again. I'm not sure what I will be doing. I do have several options open to me when that happens.

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I am unable ot give legal or medical advice. My opinions are based on my experiences and my personal research.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-13-2007 - 7:10am

My sah the last 9 years of our marriage I belive has made it stronger.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2007
Thu, 09-13-2007 - 9:09am
It hasn't.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-13-2007 - 9:23am

It was understood from the early days of our dating that we'd have kids and both WOH FT.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Thu, 09-13-2007 - 10:06am
*Waving*!!

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