How valuable is childcare?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-1999
How valuable is childcare?
142
Fri, 08-21-2009 - 6:01am

I'm mostly a lurker, but I have a question that I wanted to know opinions on.


Is there value to child care?


I'm talking about the day-to-day, hour-by-hour

Photobucket


Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2009
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 2:10pm

<>


and that can be done either by a good sahm OR a good wohm + a good dc provider.


<< it means what she's learned from SAHM being home in those early years she's

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 3:57pm
Now I get you! And oh, did I hate, hate, hate that view of SAH as wasting one's education. I got that, too, when I was a SAHM. My usual reply was that my kids were fortunate to have a mother with a master's degree, but what I *really* wanted to say was "And that's the most anti-intellectual view of education I've ever heard!" Education contributes so much more to a person than their worth
Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 4:54pm
We can agree there. people often ask dh why they should study "useless" stuff like dead langauges. It often seems that they expect him to come up with a bunch of hifallutin and drawn out explanations, but what he usually tells them is simply, "because it will make you a better person."
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 7:03pm

anecdotal.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 7:15pm
What do you think are the differences between your child, at the age of 12, and the child of a woman who has always worked outside the home?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 7:53pm

I feel that if a woman DOES assign monetary value to childcare and thinks she should be getting a six-figure income for it, then she should be willing to pay that amount also to her nanny, daycare providers, etc.

< If we (the USA) were to really take child welfare seriously then we would support extended maternity/paternity leave, provide good quality daycare to every child, and have parenting classes offered at every hospital along with childbirth classes. >

I agree, but here in the USA, this will never happen. Its a lost dream. Corporate America never has been, and never will be, family-friendly.

Most employers expect you to be at work even if your child is sick or dying. That is a fact. A FACT, not an opinion. I've seen many employers retaliate against a parent for taking time off for caring for a sick, even dying child. In most cases, employer could easily get a temp or contractor to come in and do the work. They are just too lazy or cheap to do this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 8:27pm

You don't see a difference in children? I've got 3, and though I will never leave any alone at age 12 for repeatable periods of time, because due to my own behavior at that age, 2 of my children are pretty trustworthy, and one will push the limits as a daredevil.

I had a sahm until age 14 and my mother was clueless to what teens were getting up to in hs. BTW - I went to an all-girls, parochial hs. There were lots of sex and drugs and rock and roll. My brother convinced my mom that the baggy of green stuff she found in his room was oregano that he got from a ridealong as student of day. She was also proud he was so into hothouse growing some weird green leafy plants in our basement.

The good news is that two of her children turned out just just fine as upstanding responsible members of the community. Unfortunately, one did not. I don't blame my mom, but her cluelessness didn't help my sister's hs drug addiction and subsequent death due to her addictions.

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Mon, 08-24-2009 - 2:28am

Why do you think that kids with working parents do not have routines? The idea that early "training" and right bringing up will mayhem-proof your kid in the teen years is a dangerous one, IMO. I do think that there are things you can do when kids are small that may lower the chances of mayhem a little, but first of all they have nothing to do with SAH vs WOH and secondly, at least IMO, kids need a lot of input and support in the teen years.

As others have pointed out as well, I also think that what a 2yo needs can much more easily be outsourced than what a 16yo needs.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2007
Mon, 08-24-2009 - 3:19am
I think you could take a whole group of 12 year olds and not be able to tell whose moms woh or sah. Each kid is different and each one will be able to handle things differently. My mom sah and I think I was around 12 when she went to work. My sister and I were relieved as it meant we had the house to ourselves once in a while. We lived in the middle of nowhere and we had too many chores to do to get into any trouble. The only time there was a problem was when my sister got hurt and we had to find a distant neighbor to take us to urgent care (this was the land before cell phones). My son just turned 9. He will be 11 when he starts middle school. At that point, he will be responsible for getting to school in the mornings (he will be alone for about an hour) and getting himself home (where he will be alone for about 2 hours). The school is about a 5 minute walk from here and I know he can handle it. He's never been the sort to get into trouble and I've never been over-bearing so I'm not worried about him suddenly becoming wild. He has always been independent and I think when he gets this new responsibility it will be good for him. If he were a nervous child or one
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Mon, 08-24-2009 - 8:04am

it's a shame that roles get misunderstood.

 

Pages