How young is too young?daycare?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2003
How young is too young?daycare?
954
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 1:00am
If you have a career and you had a baby what age would you think is apropriate to send your child to daycare/dayhome after they were born?

I have a friend that is a dayhome provider, she has 10mnth old twins and she was provinding care for a 2yr old. Mom of the 2yr old just had a baby and she was back to work when baby was 4days old, in my friends care. It is only half days now, but she is soon going to be full time, the baby is almost 5wks. Thoughts?

Be who you are and say what you feel because those  who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:22pm

I asked this to you before, but you did not answer...so let's try again...


I am not foolish enough to think I

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:26pm

Simply speaking for myself. . .but as a WOHM I have NO problem saying that I raise my children IN CONJUNCTION WITH their father, family friends, child care providers, coaches, teachers, clergy, etc.


MY issue with the sahm mantra (understandably used by some, not all sahm) that they sah in order to raise their children is that it negates the importance of others in the child rearing team and implies that others are raising the children of WOHMs INSTEAD OF (not in addition to) their parents.

Virgo
Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:33pm

Okay check this one out...states that breastfeeding can cause oral decay...


http://www.breastfeeding.com/all_about/all_about_oral_health.html


http://www.aboutsmiles.com/bto3h.htm


PumpkinAngel



Edited 12/11/2003 3:36:09 PM ET by pumpkinangel

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:36pm
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You didn't put in the time. The best caregiver you could find for your baby was an inexperienced 19yr old, (most certainly preocuppied with other things), university student. Not to mention, you couldn't be bothered putting in more effort than that required to look down your own hallway for a caregiver. And found someone you could pretty much "make" do your childcare. Its a novell way of helping to pay a child's way through university though, if you forgot that in order to work to help the first through, after she was all grown up and in no need of childcare - her younger sibs still would be.

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Or some might say, if your family is truly your priority, you recognize that even though a teenage daughter in university is the easiest person to bribe into doing your childcare, an inexperienced 19yr old is far from the best childcare option available, and doing childcare is far from the most suitable job for a university student. No matter how closely her dna resembles the baby's. Or yours.

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Same? Who cares. Things can be better, or just as good, without being the same.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:47pm
I couldn't agree with you more. I do believe everyone who is involved in a child's life is someone who raises them to be who they are, and that's precisely why any decent parent cares so much with whom their children spend their time. Certainly the people who have the most influence, for good or for ill, aren't necessarily the ones who put in the most hours. My issue with the WOHM mantra (understandably used by some, not all WOHM) that they are the only ones raising their children is that it negates the importance of others in the child rearing team. ;-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:49pm
<>

What they aren't getting is a chance to develop any kind of self confidence or sense of personal responsibility. They fear and mistrust the world and have no clue how to function within it.

Kids need to know how to be individuals while belonging to a herd and functionning within it and contributing to it. Human beings are social animals. To pretend otherwise...well you are wondering where all those problem kids come from? Thats where alot of them come from. From families who don't value any social group beyond the family.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:52pm

Problem with your play on my words is that I haven't seen many, if any, WOHMs claim that they are the ONLY ones raising their children- to the negation of other influences.


Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:54pm
Needless to say, having a child at 18 was not in the plans, but it happens. It is truly amazing what you can do when you are motivated by love. I had no problem whatsoever adjusting to being a mother. I always adored babies. Dd1, on the other hand, wasn't so baby crazy. She had done some babysitting from the time she was 12. She was the best caregiver I could have gotten for my ds. They knew each other, were bonded and she loved him. I could never have found another sitter who truly cared for my baby like she did. There are plenty of new mothers who have no experience. How does one gain such experience? By doing of course! Another thing that made this arrangement ideal was that I would pop home a couple times throughout the day to nurse him. I probably wouldn't have felt as comfortable doing that in someone else's home. And I would NEVER place an infant in a dc center. I would not have gone back to work if dd wasn't available and offering to caregive.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:56pm
I walked right into that one, huh.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 3:57pm
Well I certainly respect your opinion, however I was responding to her claim that my child would have been better off in a second rate child care facility than with his 19 year old sibling because she had no life experience. Perhaps if you understood the context you wouldn't be so quick to attack.

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