I see both sides and am grateful........
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|Sat, 06-07-2003 - 6:20pm|
It hasn't been easy financially or emotionally for that matter. Some days I think dealing with a boss and a job description would be easier than four kids! lol! I hear tell moms at home exist who watch soap operas, play tennis, sun themselves by the pool and eat bon-bons, but I don't know of any personally and I'm not one of those. Cleaning house, planning budget and meals to live within our means, keeping up with our kids, and homeschooling our 14 year old dyslexic dd because the stress of school was making her physically ill keeps me busy enough.
My college degree is in journalism so I do some freelance writing from home to fulfill the desire I have, like many women, to do something more and be more than someone's wife and mom, although I'm proud to hold those titles. But for me, it isn't an issue of needing recognition for anything else, just pursuing something I love. I also design stationery and note cards as a creative outlet and sometimes sell them. But neither the writing nor the cards add a significant income. It is more for myself than anything.
Having said all that, if it came down to needing two incomes to pay bills and put food on the table, I would work outside the home. I would work at McDonald's if that's what was needed. Or nights at a factory or mopping floors at a hospital. Or cleaning toilets at an office building. Or as a professional writer. My kids' welfare is a priority for my husband and me. If his job didn't meet our needs I would be working to make ends meet. For us, the issue would be providing for the needs of our children.
We choose to live in a small town in a rural area where the cost of living isn't as high so life is more affordable. We would probably not have near what we do on his income if we lived in a large city. We choose to say no to things that will put is in debt and surprisingly, doing that means we end up affording more in the long run. We live within our means and have taught the kids to as well.
I have no regrets and am very grateful for the life we have. And, I'm proud to be the support person for my husband as he works hard to provide for all of us. I realize I am blessed to be able to follow through with my desire to be at home and don't take it for granted, nor do I put down moms who make different choices than me.
One thing I do to help support my working friends is I let them put my name down in their kids's school files as a contact person in an emergency such as if the child gets sick at school and needs to be picked up. I've never had to follow through on that, but would if needed. I think that gives them some peace of mind knowing I would be there if they or a family member couldn't leave work right away or something.