If you had to choose...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
If you had to choose...
Mon, 07-14-2008 - 11:00pm

between being a full-time WOHM and a full-time SAHM (and both were feasible for you), which would you prefer, and why?
Given my job and my personality, I would prefer WOH. I don't find my job difficult or stressful. I very much enjoy it and feel energized by it. At the same time, I am lousy about domestic chores, so I would like to have the extra income for someone to help out with that. I'm also lousy at making my own routines and paying enough attention to DS, so although I love being around him, I don't have the energy to be a SAHM, and I feel that DS would actually have a better and more fun time in quality othercare.

How about you? If your choices were full-time WOHM or full-time SAHM, which would you prefer, and why?

Just so everyone knows, I'm more interested in the "why" part of the question. I've intentionally oversimplified the issue by making it an either/or choice between two options. What personality traits, desires, etc do you think would make you personally more suited to one or the other if you had to go all-or-none?


Edited 7/15/2008 9:59 am ET by finally.me


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2007
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 12:17am

I like my job and all, but seriously if I could depend on the same standard of living without working, heck YEAH, I'd stay at home!!

(But I wouldn't go looking for more kids to raise, so I dunno about the whole SAHM thing ;)





"BTW, I hate Lifetime. Their movies will suck you in and all of a sudden you've watched 3 in a row, used every tissue in t

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2007
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 12:30am
I did the FT SAHM thing for many years, and I won't be doing it again, ever. FT WOHM for me, thanks.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 4:21am
If I HAD to choose, I would choose FT WOH.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 8:34am
count me in as continuing to FT-wohm....
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 8:43am
If anything were feasible, I'd choose some kind of one year on, one year off scenario. Or maybe one month on, one month off. If I had to choose either/or, I'd choose FT WOHM.
baby in clothes basket
Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 8:51am

You know. I love my job I really do and on nights like Sunday ngiht when my job was to hang out with Kelly and greet people at the Indigo Girls show before sliding into our 3rd row aisle seats -- yeah it's pretty b*tchin.

BUT. I have to say. if the lottery were dumped in my lap.


Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2008
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 8:56am
I HAVE chosen. And I've chosen WOH.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2006
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 9:25am

Is the choice only either or? Because I'd have to pick ftsah over ftwoh after years of wah. This ftwah has calls tonight from 9-midnight, so you can catch me on the beach midday. I like my job, I like the money, but I'm much closer to retirement than you young whippersnappers. Control over time spent is much more important than money at this point in my life.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2007
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 9:43am
I have to pick one?
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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Tue, 07-15-2008 - 9:50am

I hear you. 5 years ago after the Oct 03 fires, I was making stupid mistakes at the bridal shop. I ended up taking a week off for Thanksgiving. First vacation I took since I started working at the bridal shop in 1998. It was the best thing. I had absolutely no sewing deadlines looming over me for a whole week. I was so refreshed after that week that I've taken that week off ever since. I've learned my lesson. I do need a break from sewing every now and then.


The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett