If you hadn't had kids...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
If you hadn't had kids...
1649
Thu, 05-20-2004 - 10:34pm
And your dh made enough $$ to support both of you comfortably, do you think you would be working?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:29pm

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:30pm

You know, I just realized something. You HAVE to believe that don't you? Your entire world would crumble around you if you found that someone else caring for your child a few hours a day was equally adequate.


Since you can not prove nor disprove your point, I can't debate it (though I honestly doubt it as my experience is that my Nana's care is just like Grandma's - not the same as mine but WONDERFUL for my DD).

Mondo

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:37pm

Thought question for you.

PumpkinAngel

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:40pm
Oooo!!!! I get to be YOUR minion this time. My kids do not have to go to camp. I am a SAHM and really don't NEED for them to go to camp. We were considering not sending them to camp at all and having them do fun outings with me all summer.

However, when I mentioned the possibility of being with me all summer to them I got three very glum looking faces staring back at me. They said "Mom we really LIKE camp. Can't we go to camp at all?" They really like being in a place where there are lots of kids, lots of activities, lots of stimulation. So we settled on 3 weeks of day camp and 1 week of golf camp for the older ones (ages 8, 10) and 4 weeks of day camp for the baby (who is 5).

They will each be home with me for a week without their brothers. They all liked that idea. They like the idea that they can have ALL my attention for a full week. I promised each one would be able to choose a special outing with me. They are thrilled with that. But a full summer home with me and their brothers (we are going away for 2 separate weeks) didn't leave them thrilled. Kids can choose to be away from their parents.

Jenna

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:46pm

I was speaking to my Mom on the phone the another night about my asking DH to possibly SAH when baby #2 comes. She said the SAME thing (husband breadwinner/mom nurturer).

Mondo

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:50pm

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Just curious, why would being a SAHM preclude

Hugs,

Bridget & Ethan (5)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:51pm
""Oh, you fell and you're bleeding. I'm sorry but you have to call your parents. I only teach you not care for you."

""Oh, your father hit you this morning and you have cigarette burns on yourself. You just need to figure that out yourself. I only teach. I don't do any social work or caregiving."

Like I said, these ocassions are few and far between. In fact, your examples are even more extreme than few and far between.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:57pm

and what happens when you lose the nurturer?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 4:00pm
"Well actually, the research contrindicates what you are saying. More often than not it was the older children/grandmothers who cared for tribal babies."

No it doesn't. Older children/grandmothers are *relatives* with a long term vested interest in the children, *not* paid dc/substitute caregivers who are neither related nor have a long term vested interest in them.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 4:02pm

Bleeding at school is rare? Could you tell my child and his friends that they are not suppose to bleed at school? They are constantly falling on the playground or getting nosebleeds. Are you sure you were an elementary school teacher?


I don't think the abuse one is rare either. I wish it were but, in my neck of the woods, abuse is a large problem that all of my teacher friends have dealt with one time or another.


Man, I need to live where you live. Imagine...children don't bleed and they don't get abused. Is the town called Stepford by chance?


"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

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