If you hadn't had kids...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
If you hadn't had kids...
1649
Thu, 05-20-2004 - 10:34pm
And your dh made enough $$ to support both of you comfortably, do you think you would be working?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 7:51am
Can't one not get why someone would work without thinking it's terrible to work?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 7:54am
If it is a requirement then it is not volunteering. It is unpaid labor.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:01am
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No, i have never stated any such thing. It takes both of our salaries to keep our household running. However, that also leaves quite a bit left over for personal pursuits.

LOL.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:05am

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Because some people actually ENJOY those tasks. I love being a mother. I love influencing my children, raising them, playing with them, etc. But I did NOT enjoy changing diapers or sitting for hours in the same spot while ds looked at a toe.


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That is not caring for an infant. That is reading and researching.


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Ummm, you can get that parent-child interaction while WOH.


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PNJ didn't say she didn't enjoy the company of her children. She said she needed a respite from childcaring. Can you not see the difference?

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:05am
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yes, you can be a bit narrow-minded when discussing the reasons why a mom might go back to work, LOL.

Suffice it to say that for many, we can work and STILL enjoy motherhood. Going back to work says NOTHING at all about how much enjoyment one gets out of parenting.

And while you pay lip service to "several possibilities as to why a mother would change her mind about her working status after a child arrives", i have absolutely no doubt that you can't even begin to comprehend, let alone entertain, what those reasons might be.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:05am
I really appreciate your honesty. Great (and true!) post.

Meldi

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:06am
i'd love to do my job as a volunteer, but i have bills to pay and a household to run, activities for the kids, etc. that's a FACT of life. AND, if i'm going to do what i love for pay , i might as well get paid well to do it.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:08am
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it's certainly not for a lack of people explaining it ad nauseum over the last 1+ year....and it's certainly not a difficult concept.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:09am
LOL. well, it's certainly not for our lack of trying to explain it to you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 8:11am
LOL, you remind me of the WOHMs who say they are SAHM's because "I only work when the kids are in bed, so I feel like a SAHM".

You keep mentioning all these things that you do to volunteer yet insist that you do not volunteer. It does not matter if it does not feel like voluntering to you. That is exactly what it is.

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