Interesting Day Care Debate

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Interesting Day Care Debate
6
Fri, 06-20-2003 - 1:19pm
I should probably post this on the Day Care Debate board, but since no one ever goes over there I'll post it here.

For those of you parents who use day care, and use providers with children of their own, are your kids treated like part of the family or are they treated as the "day care kids"? I was following an interesting debate on another board about providers kids being treated more special than the day care kids. Special food, different rules, etc..there was a provider posting who as a child attended day care and she and her sister were actually made to eat separately in the kitchen while the family ate their noon meal at the dining room table. I was floored at the number of providers who thought this was an ok thing to do.

As a provider, I treat all children the same INCLUDING my own. If I'm serving macaroni and cheese, my kids (who are 18 and 21) eat macaroni and cheese. If we are having dinner and it just happens that I have a couple of kids left at the end of the day, they sit down and eat dinner with us (this has happened numerous times). When my kids were young they were participants in all of our day care activities...no special rules or treatment.

What do you think? Do you think kids of providers should have special treatment? Or do you think they should be treated the same as all the other kids?

Sue

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Fri, 06-20-2003 - 2:32pm
We used 4 different home daycare situations -- ALL treated all of the kids the same (and yes, they were all moms with their own kids). Mine were never separated out for any reason.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Fri, 06-20-2003 - 3:11pm




Oh, that just pulls at my heartstrings. I think if any of us put ourselves in the shoes of a daycare child and how it would feel, the answer is obvious. Can you say Cinderella? Of course, a parent will feel differently about their own child than one they are caring for. But, treating them diffently, sitting at a dinner table with their own family while the other kids are in a different room, how sad. I'd never let my daughter stay in a situation like that. One shouldn't do childcare if they are worried about interupting their own family time. The child should be treated "like one of the family" if they are taken into their home for childcare.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-20-2003 - 3:37pm
Did any of you ever think......maybe the caregiver only had room at the dining room table for her children and the extra table was in the kitchen. So therefore, the other children would sit in there.

Maybe, just maybe.

Tonya
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Fri, 06-20-2003 - 3:42pm
Even if that were so, the dcp can split the children up differently every day, so that the same children are not in the kitchen every day. When you are taking care of children in addition to your own, you need to make sure that everything is as equal as it can be.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-20-2003 - 9:50pm
That's so sad. I would be reluctant to use a dcp whose own small kids were in the home for just that reason, even though I would not have expected the "discrimination" to be so overt.
Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-21-2003 - 4:25pm
Sue, you're one of the good ones. I'm amazed at the quality of people who will pass themselves off as child care "professionals" when they are anything but professional!! Unfortunately, too many go into dc as a means to SAH with their kids. I have a sister who did this. She used to tell her dc kids how "Sorry" she was for them becuase thier moms didn't love them enough to SAH. She claims she was just showing empathy for the poor unfortunate children she watched.