IRL case to debate. Is SAH desirable in

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
IRL case to debate. Is SAH desirable in
60
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 3:26pm

this case?

16yo boy and 15yo girl. Get pregnant. Girl's parents want (and are insistent about it) the boy to quit school and get a full time job so that the girl can do online clases to finish her HS education and continue to be a SAHM.

Thoughts?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:06pm

1. How do the girl's parents get to decide anything for the boy?

2. Why is the girl's education more important than the boy's?

3. Why isn't the girl being expected to contribute financially to this baby, especially since they are not married (I'm assuming) and not living in the same house?

4. What do the future parents want to do and why is it being left up to the girl's parents? I don't want my dds to get pregnant so young, but if they do they'll be making some tough decisions and some sacrifices.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:15pm
Give the baby up for adoption and let both kids get on with their educations.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:22pm
If I were the parents to that boy, I'd tell the girl's parents to take a flying leap. BOTH kids should finish their educations.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:23pm
Put the baby up for adoption. That is my thought. I have never understood this whole shotgun wedding scenario that takes place parallel to married couples going to Russia and China trying to find a baby to adopt. I don't understand why putting a baby up for adoption is not discussed seriously as an option for teens in this situation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:25pm
I agree and posted that as well. It baffles me that so often the false dichotomy is proposed of abortion vs. teen child-raising. Meanwhile, married couples are going all over the globe deperately trying to find babies to adopt.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:32pm
I agree. If they aren't ready to be adults, they aren't ready to be parents. If they aren't ready to be parents, they need to hand the baby over to someone who is an adult.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:33pm
Excellent response!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:33pm

Plan A: Adoption, toute de suite, if the young mom can be persuaded.

Plan B: Both sets of parents support all three of them through school, joblessness, day care, the whole nine yards, probably well past the point where they would have if the happy couple had had an actual adolescence.

If I were the parents, it would be a simple choice for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2007
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:40pm

I think adoption is a great answer.

Yeah well, that's just, ya know, like, your opinion, man-The Big Lebowski 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 4:52pm
ita...children having children is a tough situation for all involved.

 

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