Kids as an "excuse" to stay home

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Kids as an "excuse" to stay home
1429
Fri, 08-15-2008 - 2:16pm

No one would likely ever admit to this...but what percentage of women who stay at home, and have no plans to ever return to the work force, or to do more than work PT...stay home because of the kids, but also for the major fact that they simply don't want to work?


I don't love my job every second, and there's definitely jobs out there that I don't think I could get out of bed for every day. But the idea of never working again, and being completely dependent on my spouse...kind of blows my mind. I realize not everyone's of the same ilk, and one's not better than the other.


I do wonder how many of the women who go on and on about how great it is to be home with the kids, are primarily just relieved to not have to punch the clock every day in addition to being mom.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 3:04pm

Thank you. but I feel obligated to point out that the content is not really unique. At first glance, depending on the day you arrive, it may seem as though people are not doing much more than bickering (myself included). But much of what you are reading is the result of many years of having some of the same discussions with the same posters. My post could be seen as a summary or recap of just some of the reasons posters have given for working when they have small children. They are not unique and voicing them on this board is not unique.

I do not mean this to be unkind, but when someone responds harshly, they are responding to either a poster or a sentiment that they have already addressed thoughtfully, politely and carefully a dozen times.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 3:05pm

Honestly?

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 3:06pm

I guess I don't see why someone has to "merit" staying home anymore than I can understand why someone has to "justify" working outside the home.


Fair enough, and point taken.

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 3:10pm
Yes, there we can agree.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2006
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 3:28pm

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2010 Siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 3:40pm

i know. when I thank him (as I always do) he just say that it's all part of the "husband bizz....".

Sometimes I pinch myself to make sure that I'm really not dreaming;)

Eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 4:07pm

I am definitely not discounting that your post was beautiful, well written and very true.


But wouldn't you also say that a WOHM can do just as many of the wonderful things that you mentioned SAHM's do while working at the same time?


I mean, I do lots

suzjuly6.jpg picture by LadyCaribou

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 4:11pm

PLEASE. The very LAST thing in the world that i need is anyone's pity. There is nothing in the world that could prompt me to feel humiliated about my special needs dd. She's a beautiful and special child. Sah NOR woh has ANYTHING to do with that.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 4:16pm

i never sah because I LOVE my job. I'm also able to do my job AND raise my children -- in fact, I've been doing it for almost 17 years. I think I'm fairly darned good at it by now;)

and no, even if money was NOT an issue. I wouldn't SAH. i get to do that every summer.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Wed, 08-20-2008 - 4:20pm

No. I feel that I have (and have had) PLENTY of time with my kids over the last 17 years. So, I guess the question could be asked, if you could contribute in a significant monetary way would you help your family out financially?

wondering minds and all that....

eileen

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