Kids as an "excuse" to stay home

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Kids as an "excuse" to stay home
1429
Fri, 08-15-2008 - 2:16pm

No one would likely ever admit to this...but what percentage of women who stay at home, and have no plans to ever return to the work force, or to do more than work PT...stay home because of the kids, but also for the major fact that they simply don't want to work?


I don't love my job every second, and there's definitely jobs out there that I don't think I could get out of bed for every day. But the idea of never working again, and being completely dependent on my spouse...kind of blows my mind. I realize not everyone's of the same ilk, and one's not better than the other.


I do wonder how many of the women who go on and on about how great it is to be home with the kids, are primarily just relieved to not have to punch the clock every day in addition to being mom.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 7:56am

I don't feel like I've "missed anything". I mean, given that when they were in dc, it was only one piece of their day --- and there was PLENTY of time beyond that. Even in hindsight, I still feel the same way.

Dc, for them, was about fun and play. I'm sure they may have had firsts at dc, however A) there was ALL of the practice for it at home first, B) the providers never shared that they saw something first and would only mention much of the practice AFTER you said, "hey, guess what Andrew did last night?"

The only "big" thing I missed was about 5-6 years ago (or maybe more, LOL!) when ex and I had tickets to a concert that conflicted with open house night. We sent my parents. I did miss some "VIP" days at school, but usually sent one of my parents or in-laws as they all live and work in the area where we live.

So no, looking back on 17 years of parenting three (now 4 with my sd these last 2 years), I don't feel like I've "missed anything".

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 8:43am
Are you saying there's no correlation?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 8:43am
Someone.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 8:46am

"And I find it so fascinating that nothing occurs while parents are at work and that so many are able to WOH full time and still be there for everything and "not miss a thing.", lol ;)"


Sure, I've missed stuff. That's why any work status has tradeoffs. Shrug.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 8:47am
I'm quite sure I missed a lot of firsts. So what?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 9:04am


I will totally agree with this while the children are in school but when my little one was not in school she was rarely to bed before 10pm.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2008
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 9:51am
I can answer that. It's not about not wanting to spend time with your kids. I was a SAHM for many years, but honestly, I didn't like it at all. I did it, and did it happily and well, because it was necessary at the time, but I was not in my best mode spending 95% of my time around people 6 years old or less. I'm one of those people who needs more adult time than that. What's funny is that my husband is the total opposite, and is a fabulous stay at home parent. It suits him. That you can't imagine that some personalities do not mesh well with SAH is surprising.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2008
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 10:28am
Do you mind if I ask why it was necessary for you to stay home?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 11:12am

I always find it fascinating that so much occurs only during working hours, lol.


right.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Thu, 08-21-2008 - 11:17am

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