Ladies...Enough Already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Ladies...Enough Already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
779
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 2:10pm
Can we please voluntarily end this thread from grlimilakinskeeper, or whatever her screen name is...it's getting too personal, and not very productive.

Kat

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 10:17am
So why don't your kids see dad more? You seem to think a 50/50 arrangment is good for them. Why don't you have one for your kids??
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 10:26am
Yes it is and I will. I finally have someone who will consider what is in the best interest of my children on my side.

I take you think the judges out there who are taking away visitation and jailing parents for smoking around their kids are wrong. Smoking around children is tantamount to child abuse. It is WRONG. Period. It is not conditionally right or wrong. It's always wrong. Some people seem to need a judge to tell them that and some don't listen then.


Edited 10/10/2004 10:27 am ET ET by grimalkinskeeper

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 10:29am
Nothing to get over. BTDT myself, I have a pretty good idea what my girls will need and a shrink isn't warranted at this time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 10:30am
Posted in wrong spot




Edited 10/10/2004 10:43 am ET ET by grimalkinskeeper
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 10:46am
Go ahead. I'd like to hear what issues I have stemming from the emotional trauma of my parents divorce. Interesting how you claim to have so much knowledge of what goes on in my head. You must have ESP or something, lol.

FTR, I have one issue stemming from my parents divorce. A VERY STRONG beleif that kids belong in a two parent household. To get to this point took a lot. Fortunately, I now have the court on my side to help. That is something I wouldn't have had 9 years ago.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 10:49am
Try reading my posts. I've been trying. For many years, the best I could do here was stay in the marriage and police the situation to the best of my ability. Now the best I can do is get the court to order him to not smoke around his kids and let them enforce what I have been unable to.

The risk would have been greater if I'd left years ago because then he would have been free to smoke around the kids all he wanted when he had them. The risk will be greater now if the court doesn't order him to not smoke around the kids because doing all the smoking he will do when he has the kids will be more smoking around the kids than he gets away with now. I'm counting on the judge having some sense. Otherwise, the situation goes from bad to worse WRT the kids exposure to smoking.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 11:05am
we would love to have a completely 50:50 arrangement, but the FACT is that that is not what's BEST for the kids - in terms of their activities, school, etc. AND he has maximized his time by living only THREE miles from here.

BUT, we'll run through it one more time...forgive me for cutting and pasting, but if you had actually taken time to read through our time lines, i wouldn't even have to do that much.

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i should also mention that we batted around the idea of their sleeping at his house those 2 nights a week, but it would be just too crazy the next morning. he doesn't live in this school district, so would have to get everybody up and out and back here by 7 AM, LOL...OR he'd have to take the morning off and drive to 3 different towns to drop them off....it's almost too funny to comprehend.>>

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try and slice and dice it any way you want, ma'am. but the FACTS show that we HAVE and we ARE and we WILL continue to ALWAYS put their BEST interests first -- and do what we can to maximize their time with their DAD. It can't be equal for lots of reasons, mostly those having to do with his work schedule, their schedules and andrew and jenna's sports schedules and religious school -- AND he'll get 4 extra weekends per summer starting next year. Of course, it should be mentioned that "I" was one of the initial ones to say that joint physical custody does NOT need to be 50:50.

Again, thanks for playing, but you may want a refund on your game entrance fee.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 11:07am

Be honest with us..your fellow posters because right now you aren't. Never, in all this divorce emoting, have you mentioned smoking as one of the reasons you left. I have never even heard you mention your DH's smoking until his application for full custody was mentioned. Ever. I am sure you can link to some post from a year ago but I don't remember smoking ever being mentioned.


You have posted over and over and over that you started divorce proceedings because he gave you The Book. Read it again slowly...you started the divorce proceedings, according to you, because he gave you The Book. No smoking was mentioned.


Now, with the application of full custody, he smokes and it is dangerous and he deserves to never, ever see his children again or have supervised visitations. We, your fellow posters, can only go from your own posts which mention leaving for The Book not the smoking.


We aren't stupid, Cyndi, despite what you may think. You can keep revising history but most of us remember all the other posts you have written about all the other problems your DH and you had. Smoking was not mentioned.


Don't pretend you stayed married until one court in all of America decided smoking around minor children was bad. Just don't. You stayed married because...only you know that and then he gave you The Book and you had enough. Smoking never played into it according to your posts on this board.


Also, I find it odd that you have millions of posts about the importance of fathers and not working mega hours but your DH is only around your children for 1.5 hours a day in the morning? Who watches them at night when you are at school?


And once again, what was his reasoning for applying for full custodial custody of the children?

"Hasty conclusions are the mark of a fool" Sign in front of a church


Kristi

"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 11:09am
<> and what is it called when a mother ACTIVELY works AGAINST her children's Dad's visitation????

hopefully, a judge will consider that what's in the best interest of your girls is to have their FATHER in their life.

and i have no doubt whatsoever that, if he agrees to the no-smoking ban, you will find yet something else to use as a weapon against him. Just listening to you here, you don't come off as even interested in working out a feasible joint physical custody plan.

eileen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 11:18am

But it still would have given them half their childhood living in a smoke free environment.

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