Ladies...Enough Already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Find a Conversation
Ladies...Enough Already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
| Mon, 10-04-2004 - 2:10pm |
Can we please voluntarily end this thread from grlimilakinskeeper, or whatever her screen name is...it's getting too personal, and not very productive.
Kat

Pages
She is speaking from LACK of knowledge, not out of any REAL knowledge or experience.
dj
Dj
"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~
dj
Dj
"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~
Hey - at least I know I was right. What you know about this subject could fit on the head of a pin and leave room for 10,000 angels to dance.
But psychiatrists and licensed therapists are two very different things. You can't compare thier training, because they are trained in different processes.
dj
Dj
"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~
Before the therapist can "help" they need to figure out what the "problem" is. That requires a diagnosis, any way you cut it.
Well now, a 19 yr old calling up a Mom crying over a boyfriend might consitute evidence of a probelm. Of course, it could still constitute evidecne of parental over reaction. Looking back...seems just about everyone I knew was crying over relationships at that age. Everyone managed without having to pay someone to listen. However, perhaps you were less able to cope. WHY are you assuming your poor child is in the same boat as you, rather than as capable as others? AND WHY ARE YOU ASSUMING GRIMALS CHILDREN HAVE YOUR PARTICULAR ISSUES WITH LIFE?
Because chances are, she can. By overreacting to the rather small possibility that she can't, you are TELLING her no question, that she can't. Which is what she will think, going forward. "I'm upset. I have not one, but two problems. One problem is the issue that is upsetting me. The second problem is the fact that I'm upset". Who needs it.
I really would not expect a child to talk to a mother or father about the divorce, unless of course, the child were fairly certain she had parents who could hear what they'd rather not. Most children are probably, correctly, fairly certain they don't have such parents. Does this child not have anyone in her life, who is on her side and who is her friend first, who is not in her parents confidence? ICK.
Well we aren't really discussing YOUR child. We are discussing GRIMAL'S children who SHE knows, and YOU don't. SHE is their MOM. YOU are just some poster on a BULLETIN BOARD. WHY in the world are you assuming YOU know GRIMALS children, if I DON'T KNOW YOURS?
I wonder if all these parents are taking this approach in order to prevent their children from talking to other people in their lives - because the parents are trying to control who knows what about the family life? Too bad for those parents. It almost certainly won't work. I do think parents are being a little naive to think that kids are going to let down the "adult interaction" guard and become all comfy and open and honest, just because Mom wrote a $15 cheque to an adult who closed a door and said "I won't tell". Trust is earned and it develops over time. It can't be bought and mandated on the spot. Which of course would be why, unless the child is really isolated, the real and most useful therapy is happennig probably at lunch hour...and the $15, if it buys nothing else, probably buys a few regular lunch room laughs as the most recent session is trotted out for peer group inspection and entertainment purposes.
Pages