Lean On Your Husband?

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Lean On Your Husband?
9
Wed, 11-27-2013 - 12:48pm

Wow, I'm not even sure where to start with this one!  From an iVillage article: 

In an article for Fox News, Suzanne Venker writes that if women want a family, they need a man. 

“Financial independence is a great thing, but you can’t take your paycheck to bed with you,” she writes. “And there’s nothing empowering about being beholden to an employer when what you really want is to have a baby. That’s dependency of a different sort.”

She continues that a husband is necessary for a woman, especially a mother, to live a balanced life, urging women to depend on the “more linear career goals” of men. “…Why not let husbands bring home the bulk of the bacon so women can have the balanced lives they seek?” she writes. “There’s no way to be a wife, a mother and a full-time employee and still create balance. But you can have balance by depending on a husband who works full-time and year-round.”

Cue the sounds of modern women whimpering (or screaming?) everywhere.

Read more, including a response from Amy McCarthy on Bustle.com here: http://www.ivillage.com/suzanne-venker-fox-news-article-women-need-husbands/6-a-554346

What are your thoughts on her opinion that woman should be leaning on their husbands?  What does that mean for single moms, or wives who husbands leave them for greener pastures?

Avatar for savcal2011
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2010
Fri, 11-29-2013 - 12:58pm

My husband and I lean on each other - we're partners.

 

I didn't read the whole article, but was quoted here is crap.

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Fri, 11-29-2013 - 8:06am

jamblessedthree wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">chestnuthooligan</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;Idiotic, 1950s, nonsense.&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;I have the balance I want because I have a partner who is and always wanted to be an equal parent. My husband wants a balance too.&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>You didn't have kids before you married the man you're with now? </p>

No, I did not.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Fri, 11-29-2013 - 7:13am

"Teacher" and "Historian" is part of who I am, not just "what I do to make money."  I can't lean on another person to be me.

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Fri, 11-29-2013 - 5:54am

chestnuthooligan wrote:
<p>Idiotic, 1950s, nonsense.</p><p>I have the balance I want because I have a partner who is and always wanted to be an equal parent. My husband wants a balance too.</p>

You didn't have kids before you married the man you're with now? 

 

 

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Fri, 11-29-2013 - 2:24am
"I have the balance I want because I have a partner who is and always wanted to be an equal parent. My husband wants a balance too." ------- Which is the situation I see more and more, especially among people slightly younger than I am.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Thu, 11-28-2013 - 7:50pm

Idiotic, 1950s, nonsense.

I have the balance I want because I have a partner who is and always wanted to be an equal parent. My husband wants a balance too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Thu, 11-28-2013 - 8:48am

jamblessedthree wrote:
Maybe it should be rephrased to read, wives should lean on their husbands as husbands should and do lean on their wives too. Not all women lean on a man nor should they be obligated to do so but marry the man you love and you'd think something like that would come naturally!

ITA

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Thu, 11-28-2013 - 8:41am
Maybe it should be rephrased to read, wives should lean on their husbands as husbands should and do lean on their wives too. Not all women lean on a man nor should they be obligated to do so but marry the man you love and you'd think something like that would come naturally!

 


 


Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Thu, 11-28-2013 - 3:48am

Well, first of all I seem to remember seeing a recent statistic, which indicated that there are now more female than male breadwinners in the US. Many of those are single, female heads of household, but still.

Secondly, Arghhh! Just ARGHH! Since when is having a baby in conflict with having a good job? Oh, that would be ever since women AND men were all expected to participate in the work force without reasonable and decent family policies and without affordable, up-to-snuff childcare.