Met a mom last week with 3 kids under 3

Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Met a mom last week with 3 kids under 3
1350
Sat, 03-25-2006 - 9:59am

A 2 year old and 17 month old twins. First she accomplished *that* through two surrogates! Wonderful what modern medicine can do.
Anyway, she doesnt work full time, she consults to several companies so is out of the home one full day then a few hours a day on other days. Sometimes for work, sometimes to go to the gym, etc.
She has a full time live in nanny, and two part time nannies. Essentially they always have someone with them and the kids. She feels she needs two to properly care for her three.
I immediately thought of all the comments her lifestyle would elicit from this board.
The day she and I met she had just come from a 2 hour session at the gym, and was then heading off to go do some shopping.
BTW, she's a complete rock star in industry, having 'retired' a year ago after a 30 year career that took her right up to the top of corporate America so she's definetly *earned* her right to do whatever the heck she wants.
But anyway, she feels she is a super hands on mom. I was curious what others would think?

MM

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:42pm
The idea that a school enviornment is the ideal way for kids to learn this. You don't go to school with your children, do you?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:43pm
Apparently there are two distinctions.... either you shield your children totally from bad influences, or you totally ignore them and let them deal with it on their own.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:44pm
That's awesome. Ask around though, bullying is a big issue and so is looking the other way so as not to get singled out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:44pm

"I'm sure exceptions would have to be made for children like this."

Yes, I think kids like this require very special consideration. The only thing I worry about is the tendency to treat such a child as an amazing brain and forget that he is, first and foremost, physically, emotionally and socially a *child*. I'm not at all thinking that the particular family you know are doing this, but I have seen the tendency quite often enough that it worries me.

The best thing one can do in such a case, imo, is support his interests as much as possible while making sure that he has plenty of opportunity to learn how to function well socially with all kinds of people, especially kids his age who are not necessarily gifted.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:45pm
They need to be taught what to do and they need the practice of doing it *without* parents right behind them. I'd prefer my children get this practice when the risks are much lower. I don't think it would be a good thing if my child's *first* experience with dealing with a bad influence on his/her own is with something potentially dangerous when they are a teen.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:45pm
of course it is not impossible to make friends, my daughter changed schools in the 8th grade, but it is difficult to break into already formed groups. and regardless of how many middle schools converge those groups will have already been set at the middle school level. hopefully your daughter will not have problems, my daughter did, it was very hard and took over a year for her to get into the right group of people and in the mean time she made some unwise choices because the need to be accepted, by any group, over rode the need to make wise choices.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:47pm
I would say that depends on the schools. I would say bad influences are common though.My bil teaches highschool and says that it is common for teachers to spend a lot of time that should be spent teaching disciplining the troublemakers.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:50pm
Of course they should, but when should they be dealing with it completely on their own? That would vary from child to child.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:53pm
How would that be their only experience though, unless the kid lives in a bubble?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 2:54pm

Gifted children tend to come from parents who are gifted. Why do you assume they have only a high school education?

A teaching license doesn't necessarily help when one is trying to educate a highly gifted child. The type of person who typically pursues a teaching license isn't necessarily the best choice of teacher for a highly gifted child. (Gifted children tend to be best taught by teachers/mentors who are themselves gifted.) Many homeschooling parents of highly gifted children let their children design their own educations; they just facilitate by helping find mentors and co-ops and providing resources, transportation, and other support. Some gifted children have such a drive to learn, there is no way that you could say that removing them from regular school wasn't helping them.

Pages