Met a mom last week with 3 kids under 3

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Met a mom last week with 3 kids under 3
1350
Sat, 03-25-2006 - 9:59am

A 2 year old and 17 month old twins. First she accomplished *that* through two surrogates! Wonderful what modern medicine can do.
Anyway, she doesnt work full time, she consults to several companies so is out of the home one full day then a few hours a day on other days. Sometimes for work, sometimes to go to the gym, etc.
She has a full time live in nanny, and two part time nannies. Essentially they always have someone with them and the kids. She feels she needs two to properly care for her three.
I immediately thought of all the comments her lifestyle would elicit from this board.
The day she and I met she had just come from a 2 hour session at the gym, and was then heading off to go do some shopping.
BTW, she's a complete rock star in industry, having 'retired' a year ago after a 30 year career that took her right up to the top of corporate America so she's definetly *earned* her right to do whatever the heck she wants.
But anyway, she feels she is a super hands on mom. I was curious what others would think?

MM

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:01pm
Sometimes nothing you can do will work. To wit, those "boot camps" where a kid either died or got killed a few weeks ago, remember? 14yo and he somehow died while being restrained. Those places are huge today because nothing else worked. Not that I'm endorsing them or anything.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:02pm

In my experience and my area the two don't always go hand in hand.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:03pm
But ultimately it's about what the market (the resale home market) values, which is location, including your lakefrontage, but also the school system.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:07pm
Where did I say that was a good soulution?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:22pm

Sex and drugs fall in the category of "social risk situation". Street smarts are the ability to assess and safely deal with social risk situations. If somebody doesn't have street smarts that does NOT mean they won't be exposed to sex and drug social risk situations. It means they won't recognize the warning signs that such a situation is about to take place. And they won't have the skills to get themselves out of it if they become unwittingly entangled.

Sex and drugs are an example of risk. Street smarts are a skill set for dealing with that risk. And they are a skill set that takes practice. Warnings and advice from parents are important but only part of the equation. The other part is practise. Practise in dealing with the less dangerous social risk situations that come up younger- such as avoiding the boy who wants to grope and just saying no to a puff on a cigarette snagged from some friend's mom's purse.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:37pm
If you weren't implying that, then I guess we agree, and are debating about nothing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:56pm
but do you really think sex and drugs are a issue in a quality elementary school. and i really want my kids to have experince in dealing with negative situations before they get to the age where those things are an issue
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 4:59pm
unless you are physically present how are you more readily available than a parent whose child is in school. i know i am a phone call away and it takes me less than 10 minutes to get to the school
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 5:00pm
I think that commitment is probably the most important thing in a marriage. Not commitment meaning "We are married and will stay married no matter what" but commitment meaning "I want to be married to you and will do anything I can to make it a good marriage". I think both partners sharing that commitment trumps age of marriage and other thing that make a marriage more statistically likely to fail.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Tue, 03-28-2006 - 5:01pm
if your (not you) kids wont talk to you about their day you have bigger issues than whether to homeschool or not
Jennie

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