Met a mom last week with 3 kids under 3

Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Met a mom last week with 3 kids under 3
1350
Sat, 03-25-2006 - 9:59am

A 2 year old and 17 month old twins. First she accomplished *that* through two surrogates! Wonderful what modern medicine can do.
Anyway, she doesnt work full time, she consults to several companies so is out of the home one full day then a few hours a day on other days. Sometimes for work, sometimes to go to the gym, etc.
She has a full time live in nanny, and two part time nannies. Essentially they always have someone with them and the kids. She feels she needs two to properly care for her three.
I immediately thought of all the comments her lifestyle would elicit from this board.
The day she and I met she had just come from a 2 hour session at the gym, and was then heading off to go do some shopping.
BTW, she's a complete rock star in industry, having 'retired' a year ago after a 30 year career that took her right up to the top of corporate America so she's definetly *earned* her right to do whatever the heck she wants.
But anyway, she feels she is a super hands on mom. I was curious what others would think?

MM

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 03-29-2006 - 7:15pm

Neither of thsoe definitions precludes the other.

Preschool: a school for children usually under five years

Daycare: supervision of and care for children or disabled adults that is provided during the day by a person or organization

I would assume that preschool involves supervision, takes place during the day, and is provided by a person or organization. Likewise, daycare is usually for children under 5. See the problem?

You're not calling a spade a spade, you're putting a pretty word on something so you can say your child is *not* in daycare. Clearly, that is important to you but that does not mean that your arbitrary designations are meaningful to anyone else.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 03-29-2006 - 8:04pm

Who knew, who knew?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2005
Wed, 03-29-2006 - 10:17pm

My siblings and I all graduated from Midwest public high schools. Latin was taught in all of them. My German teacher was also the Latin teacher.

Those schools I know of which have dropped Latin have done so because of a lack of qualified teachers, not because the administration felt the curriculum was unwarranted/unnecessary. If, in your school system, Latin is considered a low priority, then I feel sorrry for all the students ill-served by that school. Latin is the underpinning to virtually every European language in one form or another; it's an excellent "bridge" language between English and the Slavic languages in that study of Latin makes learning a Slavic language much easier and learning ANY of the Slavic languages opens the door to at least a nominal aural comprehension of the others. Latin is a Rosetta stone of many modern languages and if, as you claim, it is no longer considered a priority or important, then I pity the students studying within such school systems.

Karen


" God: "Jeff did kind of steal that '39 Days, 39 Nights, One Survivor' thing from me, if you think about it.""


Miss Alli @ TelevisionWithoutPity, Survivor: Exile Island



Image hosting by PhotobucketImage hosting by PhotobucketImage hosting by Photobucket

Karen

"Veronica: "I hate fake deer too. Every time I see their stupid fake-deer faces I want to grab a shotgun and go all Cheney on 'em." Sure, but since fake deer don't talk, they won't

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2005
Wed, 03-29-2006 - 10:33pm

John has always been gifted in math--he has had a grasp of advanced math concepts from a very early age--I mean, scary/mad advanced in some ways (at least to me).

and he struggled with reading. Learned it within the "normal" period (sometimes between ages 4 and 7), but at the very late end of "normal". Verbally, he was also quite advanced, but it was the written form of language that he did not grasp.

One of the reasons why it caused such issues *and* why for many years he didn't enjoy reading at all, was because he was used to being "the smart one" because of his gift with mathematics. He took a very very long time to accept the fact that he'd actually had to WORK at learning to read. Now...within a year of him finally "getting" reading, he was well ahead of grade level in reading as well, but it MIDDLE school before he really looked at himself as being a "good" reader.

Even today, at 23, he still shows some signs of being a struggling reader--or at least signs I always think of among people I know who don't often read for enjoyment or struggle a bit compared to those I think of as "good" readers. He does things like, mention the number of pages the book he's currently readiing has and keeps a track of how many pages he's read. You know what I mean? In my experience (and perhaps this isn't universal), but people who are good readers rarely mention how many pages a book has, but focus on the story. Those who struggle tend to take great pride in their quantity. And to an extent, John still does this, even though he's aced all his college level English/composition courses and tends to sign up for them when he's also taking a particularly difficultt math or science course--so...he's not what I would consider a poor reader. He just still demonstrates those characteristics. I'm probably not making a lot of sense, so I'll stop babbling.

the point is, I agree that advancing a gifted student is NOT always in their best interest. John could work 5th grade math problems easily--and explain them to 5th grade students who were struggling--but he needed an assistant to read word problems to him until the 3rd grade. Math was the language in which he was literate, I guess you could say, and written English was almost a second language. Advancing him would not have done him any good.

Because of John's gift with math, I've met a good many other parents within the school system's gifted and talented programs. Most of them were quite offended if no one thought their little darlings should be skipping grades and several attempted, at one time or another, to get my ex and I to join them in an attempt to get our kids into higher grades. neither my ex nor I felt this was in John's best interest, and often we felt it was more for the parents' egos than for their children's good. There are a lot of socially isolated and stunted kids in the GT program that we saw; advancing a grade would seem to lengthen that distance and make the kids MORE isolated, in our opinion.

Karen


" God: "Jeff did kind of steal that '39 Days, 39 Nights, One Survivor' thing from me, if you think about it.""


Miss Alli @ TelevisionWithoutPity, Survivor: Exile Island



Image hosting by PhotobucketImage hosting by PhotobucketImage hosting by Photobucket

Karen

"Veronica: "I hate fake deer too. Every time I see their stupid fake-deer faces I want to grab a shotgun and go all Cheney on 'em." Sure, but since fake deer don't talk, they won't

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2005
Wed, 03-29-2006 - 10:40pm

I wouldn't pay a dime for tutoring for my kids from someone who is not or had never been affiliated with the schools.

Actually, I might. Over the years, I've met various people, professionals in the fields of science and mathematics, who based on their personalities, I wouldn't have hesitated to hire as a tutor if I'd thought John needed the help.

One, in particular, is a former neighbor of mine. He did work with the Department of Natural Resources and had lots of field experience in wildlife, natural environments, eco-systems...that kind of thing. He was about the mostt approachable, friendly guy ever. And kids just flocked to him because he just had a way about him where he could make the lowliest bug in the backyard seem like the most fascinating creature God had ever created. He was very Bill Nye-ish, if you know what I mean.

he'd never taught formally, had no affiliation with the public schools, but he was just a born, natural teacher. I'd have hired him as a tutor in a blue minute, had John ever had the need. It was a sad day for our neighborhood when they moved, but he got a really cool job in Michigan.





Karen


" God: "Jeff did kind of steal that '39 Days, 39 Nights, One Survivor' thing from me, if you think about it.""


Miss Alli @ TelevisionWithoutPity, Survivor: Exile Island



Image hosting by PhotobucketImage hosting by PhotobucketImage hosting by Photobucket



Edited 3/30/2006 12:17 am ET by jzygayle

Karen

"Veronica: "I hate fake deer too. Every time I see their stupid fake-deer faces I want to grab a shotgun and go all Cheney on 'em." Sure, but since fake deer don't talk, they won't

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 03-29-2006 - 11:40pm
i know our goal in selecting our school district was not to keep our kids away from the everyday negative influences of other kids. we wanted them in a school where they would feel safe and that would meet thier educational needs. i really think it is possible to overprotect kids. i feel it is important for my kids to learn to deal with the everyday trials and tribulations that occur in the school setting, i do not feel it is important for them to have to worry about weapons, gangs or metal detectors in their schools
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 1:13am

I'm glad you feel so passionate about the study of Latin in high school. I wish I had had the opportunity to study Latin in high school myself and I hope that it is offered to my children when they are in high school. I see that the high school you graduated from doesn't offer Chinese or Japanese. Some people think that studying those languages can be quite valuable as well. My school district prides itself in its Chinese program and attracts students from surrounding communities to study Chinese. I would guess that a high school foreign language department has limited resources and that not every foreign language can be taught at one high school.

I don't know why Latin isn't offered here. I can't say that it is because someone thinks it is unwarranted or unnecessary. Maybe it was offered at one time and there wasn't enough interest. Maybe the school board was convinced that offering a language like Chinese given the current global economy was a better way to prepare students for the future. I don't know. I think it would be great if more kids had the chance to study Latin at school. We are big fans of Latin here so I get what you are saying. But really, I don't think the lack of Latin instruction is going to doom these students to a life of misery and abject failure, so you might want to save your pity for some other deserving group.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 5:19am
I didn't say it was needed only that is may help that the parent is more readily available. That doesn't of course mean the kid is going to talk.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 5:20am
That's good.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2005
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 5:20am

I've known classmates like John who are excellent with math. I don't know if this is relevant but it's so interesting how the brain develops and how the reading/writing part of John's brain eventually caught up with the part of his brain which allowed him to excel in math and later English too. I read a book once called Left brain, Right brain that I'm sure you would find interesting.

I didn't know so many parents were fighting for the gifted label. When DH was in 3rd grade, his teacher approached his parents and raised the idea that he should skip a grade. His mother thought DH was delayed! But she's no brain surgeon herself. ;p

The same thing has happened with my DD. The school approached us about skipping a grade. I think that's an essential starting point. So few people are gifted in one area, let alone all areas. And I think even the best-intentioned parents are doing irreversible damage to the child's personality by fighting for years and years to get blood from a stone. It's like, let it go already! The child knows what is going on and will get depressed. What we've done is look at our situation only, spoken with the experts and have not had a need to contact other parents either.

BTW, I love the way you write. You are great with words. This is kinda poetic, KWIM: <>

I hope you're writing something now ~ autobiography, poetry, short stories. You...never....know...!

Pages