mommy guilt

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
mommy guilt
76
Tue, 02-24-2009 - 3:57pm
hello!! so my dd made me feel bad today, but i cant change to do what she wants me to do...she faked a stomachache today because she wanted "to spend time with me." she claims she hardly gets to see me. i do work a lot of nights m-f and lately i

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Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 4:14am
I don't think it is a question of "have to" vs "choose to." I think it is a question of being secure in your choices, which you obviously are. It is the couldas, wouldas, oughtas that give rise to guilt. One thing I have tried to do as a parent is make decisions I can stand behind at least 95% and preferably 100%.
Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 4:16am
LOL, that is a nice one. I may have to steal that.
Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 4:21am
That's true, although fairly rare I think. There is a family at dd's school with 4 kids (although 2 of them are in college already). Both parents have taken early retirement and both SAH. The father is very involved in the PTA, for example.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 6:41am
well sure I mean hypothetically I could have chosen to be a rodeo clown if I'd wished...we choose what we choose for all numbers of reasons.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 8:49am

but there are big income ranges within each tax bracket.

 

Avatar for mommy2amani
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 10:22am

<wow...in my world highly educated people who marry each other don't always choose the kind of career paths that make this possible -- yet oddly enough they're still happy LOL >


We could CT have either of us, but not both of us, stay home, but neither of us is "highly" educated.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2009
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 10:52am

"...but there are big income ranges within each tax bracket.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 11:49am

all (i'm trying to say) pnj is that mothers who are in CT situations are the same mothers whose later jobs aren't about the money.

 

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 11:52am
Oh! I think to most people here CT jobs are quite different from the ones you describe. When I talk about CT it simply means that the family could manage without the CT salary. It in no way means or even implies that the CT job is a hobby-job or badly paid. I know that there are several CTWOHMs on this board who make far more than 40-50K a year.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2009
In reply to: jhbear419
Tue, 03-03-2009 - 12:14pm
But I'm a "choose to" work mom, and I'm in it partly for the money.

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