A Neat and Clean House vs Children
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| Tue, 07-27-2010 - 8:35am |
For those of you who like a neat and clean house, how do you keep it that way with children?
I find that if I am tied to goal of having a neat and clean house, I become a raging shrew against my children as they proceed to undo all the neatness I have worked so hard to attain. If I made a "neat and clean house" my goal, my children would not have their messy projects that take days/weeks to complete. My children would not pick up a book (casually left out)as they walk through the family room and browse through- discovering once again the mother actually knows about a few good books. I would let them watch more tv/computer time, as they don't make things as messy when they do. I would squash their ideas if I thought it would make too much of a mess. I wouldn't let them cook/experiment in the kitchen- as it is usually more work for me to clean up after they have "cleaned up". So, how do you inspire creativity and imagination in a neat and clean house? Are you on top of them to put things away as soon as they are done even if it is temporary? Where do you put the legos?....... Have you ever allowed them to take over the living room with all of their toys arranged in a city complex (thomas the train things were the Metro, legos and blocks were the buildings....)? How long would it stay up? Would let it be up for the summer so they could add to and change tings around as they got new ideas? Or allowed them to take over half of the family room for a month+ while they build and live in a beaver lodge (using all the empty shoe and other boxes and some that weren't empty)? Even if you have to walk around it everyday to get to the kitchen? Or do you require that all toys be put away everyday?

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Because most, ime, people that are making dinner don't want to fix a separate meal just because one person decided they didn't want what was fo rdinner that night. I do really think that people like PD are the exception, not the rule.
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They can either not go, or make the others change.
I do not remember where anything was mentioned about a child making a parent prepare something different for them .
Some people have mentioned that they will cater to their child's wants, some have mentioned that they will to a small degree (serve two vegetables for example), some said that the child is free to make their own food if they do like what is served, some have said that the only options are what is served.
No one said anything about their child making them prepare something different for them.
If a child is forcing a parent to cater to them then I would see it as an issue.
Aside from that I see it as a personal family issue for each family to decide how to handle on their own. Just like so many issue in parenting whatever the choice it will not cause any long term adverse problems. Most kids will grow up to be productive adults regardless of their own family's meal rules.
Mine only cooks for 45min and hour (I think? It's been a while). It defintiely isn't several hours.
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Because most, ime, people that are making dinner don't want to fix a separate meal just because one person decided they didn't want what was fo rdinner that night. I do really think that people like PD are the exception, not the rule.
Yes, IYE.
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They can either not go, or make the others change. Or, they could just put on their big girl panties and deal with it.
Deal with eating food they do not like?
Okay, I should have said "you don't expect someone else to make it." I didn't mean it in terms of forcing.
But the point remains that the parent is making that extra meal, going to that extra time and effort because it is what the child wants.
I don't. Three of my four kids will eat most or at least enough of whatever I make for dinner. My other child likes to be fussy. It's not necessarily that he doesn't like whatever I've made, he'll just decide that he doesn't feel like eating it. While I don't get in an argument with him over the meal, or force him to eat everything, I don't allow him to eat something else other than fruit. Otherwise, 9x out of 10, he'd just opt to have a bowl of cereal or PB&J. Because I think he needs to be exposed to certain nutrients that aren't available in those two things, I feel it's important that he doesn't just have the option to turn his nose up b/c he's not particularly in the mood for whatever I've made. I'd be more inclined to allow that if it were once in a while. However, it's nearly every night that he makes comments about not wanting whatever I've made even when it is something I *know* he likes. So now I don't even give him that option anymore.
For example, all my kids eat grilled salmon and tuna. I know it's not their favorite thing, but they'll eat it. If I gave them the choice though, they'd probably choose to have something else. Not giving them the choice encourages them to eat things they might not otherwise have. There is nothing that drives me crazier than kids who only want chicken nuggets and pizza.
Who gets to define "necessary"?
Ten Rules for Being Human
Malcolm Gladwell Blink
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Yes.
But that wasn't what I said. I was talking about "exactly what they want" not "eat something they don't like."
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